"Pregnant woman and a lightbulb" joke

Q: What's the difference between a pregnant woman and a lightbulb?
A: You can un-screw a lightbulb!

A guy calls a company and orders their 5-day, 5kg weight loss program.

The next day, there's a knock on the door and there stands before him a voluptuous, athletic, 19 year old babe dressed in nothing but a pair of Nike running shoes and a sign around her more...

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Your mamas so old, that when i told her to act her age she dropped dead!!!

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A very absent-minded professor entered a crowded bus, with no available seats. Suddenly a little girl raised from her seat and offered it to the professor. He was astonished and said to her:
- You are a very good girl, what's your name?
- My name is Eve, daddy...

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A guy says to his friend, "I can't remember if the doctor told me my wife has AIDS or Alzheimer's."
His friend says, "It's simple. Drive her to the other side of town. If she finds her way home, don't fuck her."

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Q:what did god say when the first black person came to heaven?
A:oops I must of burnt one!!

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suzan:Would of been better if he looked at her in amusement and said "...I'll be expecting better grades from you when we get around to reproduction".
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Eyelid Man:My right eyelid is really soft and delicate...
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tim:it's alright
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Anonymous:i neet good joks
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TZARIST:crazy
Funny Joke? 116 vote(s). 69% are positive. 5 comment(s).