"One More Time" joke
Three gay men died, and were going to be cremated. Their
lovers (Rascal, Dumbass, Bobby) happened to be at the funeral home at the
same time,
and were discussing what they planned to do with the ashes.
The first man (Rascal) said, 'My Benny loved to fly, so I'm going up
in a plane and scatter his ashes in the sky.'
The second man (Dumbass) said, 'My Carl was a good fisherman, so I'm
going to scatter his ashes in our favorite lake.'
The third man (Bobby) said, 'My Jim was such a good lover, I think
I'm
going to dump his ashes in a pot of chili, so he can tear my
ass up just one more time.'
Once upon a time, there lived a man who had a terrible passion for baked beans.
He loved them, but they always had an embarrassing and somewhat lively reaction
on him. One day he met a girl and fell in love. When it was apparent that they
would marry, he thought to more...
If Ida Lupino married George Wendt, then divorced him to marry Ted Danson, divorced him to marry Alan Alda, then divorced him to marry Ted Knight, and divorced him to marry Shelly Long, she'd be Ida Wendt Danson Alda Knight Long.
If Whoopi Goldberg married Peter Cushing, more...
Three men were all applying for the same job as a detective. One was Polish, one was Jewish, and one was Italian. Rather than ask the standard questions during the interview, the chief decided to ask each applicant just one question and base his decision upon that more...
A lawyer and a blonde are sitting next to each other on a long flight from LA to NY. The lawyer leans over to her and asks if she would like to play a fun game. The blonde just wants to take a nap, so she politely declines and rolls over to the window to catch a few more...
A blonde walks into a bank in New York City and asks for the loan officer. She says she's going to Europe on business for two weeks and needs to borrow $5, 000.00.
The bank officer says the bank will need some kind of security for the loan, so the blonde hands over the keys more...