"Norm Peterson's Famous Quotes (from TV's 'Cheers')" joke

Norm Peterson's Famous Quotes (from TV's' Cheers')
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' Can I draw you a beer, Norm? '
' No, I know what they look like. Just pour me one.'

' How's a beer sound, Norm?'
' I dunno. I usually finish them before they get a word in.'

' What's shaking, Norm?'
' All four cheeks and a couple of chins.'

' What would you say to a nice beer, Normie?'
' Going Down?'

' What's new, Normie?'
' Terrorists, Sam. They've taken over my stomach and they're
demanding beer.'

' What'll it be, Normie?'
' Just the usual, Coach. I'll have a froth of beer and a snorkel.'

' What would you say to a beer, Normie?'
' Daddy wuvs you.'

' What'd you like, Normie?'
' A reason to live. Give me another beer.'

' What'll you have, Normie?'
' Well, I'm in a gambling mood, Sammy. I'll take a
glass of whatever comes out of that tap.'
' Looks like beer, Norm.'
' Call me Mister Lucky.'

' What'd you say, Norm?'
' Any cheap, tawdry thing that will get me a beer.'

' What would you say to a beer, Norm?'
' Hiya, sailor. New in town?'

(Coming in from the rain)
' Evening, everybody.'
Everybody:' Norm!'
' Still pouring, Norm?'
' That's funny, I was about to ask you the same thing.'

' Whaddya say, Norm?'
' Well, I never met a beer I didn't drink.'

' Hey Norm, how's the world been treating you?'
' Like a baby treats a diaper.'

' Would you like a beer, Mr. Peterson?'
' No, I'd like a dead cat in a glass.'

' How's life treating you?'
' It's not, Sammy, but you can.'

' What's the story, Mr. Peterson?'
' The Bobbsey twins go to the brewery. Let's cut to the happy
ending.'

' Hey Mr. Peterson, there's a cold one waiting for you.'
' I know. If she calls, I'm not here.'

' Beer, Norm?'
' Have I gotten that predictable? Good.'

' What's going on, Mr. Peterson?'
' A flashing sign in my gut that says,' Insert beer here.''

' Hey Mr. Peterson, Jack Frost nipping at your nose?'
' Yep, now let's get Joe Beer nipping at my liver, huh?'

' What's going on, Mr. Peterson?'
' Another layer for the winter, Wood.'

' Whatcha up to, Norm?'
' My ideal weight if I were eleven feet tall.'

' How's it going, Mr. Peterson?'
' Poor.'
' I'm sorry to hear that.'
' No, I mean pour.'

' How's life treating you Norm?'
' Like it caught me sleeping with its wife.'

' Women. Can't live with' em....pass the beer nuts.'

' What's going down, Normie?'
' My butt cheeks on that bar stool.'

' Pour you a beer, Mr. Peterson?'
' Alright, but stop me at one....make that one-thirty.'

' How's it going, Mr. Peterson?'
' It's a dog eat dog world, Woody, and I'm wearing
Milk Bone underwear.'

' What's the story, Norm?'
' Boy meets beer. Boy drinks beer. Boy meets another beer.'

' How's about a beer, Norm?'
' That's that amber sudsy stuff, right?
I've heard good things about it!'

' What's going on, Mr. Peterson?'
' The question is' what's going in, Mr. Peterson?'
A beer please, Woody.'

' Can I pour you a beer, Mr. Peterson?'
' A little early isn't it, Woody?'
' For a beer?'
' No, for stupid questions.'