"Grandma's condom" joke

Two old ladies were outside their nursing home, having a smoke, when it started to rain. One of the ladies pulled out a condom, cut off the end, put it over her cigarette, and continued smoking.

Myrtle: What's that?

Beatrice: A condom. This way my cigarette doesn't get wet.

Myrtle: Where did you get it?

Beatrice: You can get them at any drugstore.

The next day, Myrtle hobbles herself into the local drugstore and announces to the pharmacist that she wants a package of condoms. The guy looks at her kind of strangely (she is, after all, over 80 years of age), but politely asks what brand she prefers.

Myrtle: It doesn't matter as long as it fits a Camel.