"Drunk" joke

I went out on the piss last night and pulled a georgeous bird.

We made love several times before falling asleep in each others arms.

When I woke up though I had the shock of my life.

She'd put on 60 pounds during the night.

All you want for Christmas is a hairline!

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A couple of women were playing golf one sunny Saturday morning. The first of the twosome teed off and watched in horror as her ball headed directly toward a foursome of men playing the next hole.
Indeed, the ball hit one of the men, and he immediately clasped his hands more...

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A little boy goes up to his father and asks: "Dad, what's the difference between hypothetical and reality?"
The father replies: "Well son, I could give you the book definitions, but I feel it could be best to show you by example. Go upstairs and ask your more...

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In a crowded city at a crowded bus stop, a beautiful blonde was waiting for the bus. She was decked out in a tight leather mini skirt with matching tight leather boots and jacket. As the bus rolled up and it became her turn to get on, she became aware that her skirt was too more...

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Your Mamma's so fat, when she went bungee jumping, she broke the bridge!

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