"Drunk" joke

I went out on the piss last night and pulled a georgeous bird.

We made love several times before falling asleep in each others arms.

When I woke up though I had the shock of my life.

She'd put on 60 pounds during the night.

A duck walks into a general store and asks the manager:
- "Got any fresh fruit?"
- "No."
- "Got any fresh vegetables?"
- "No. We have only canned and dry goods."
The next day, the duck returns:
- "Got any fresh more...

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A very attractive lady goes up to a bar in a quiet rural pub. She gestures alluringly to the bartender who comes over immediately. When he arrives, she seductively signals that he should bring his face closer to hers. When he does, she begins to gently caress his full more...

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A young ventriloquist is touring the clubs and one night he's doing a show in a small club in a small town in Arkansas.
With his dummy on his knee, he's going through his usual dumb blonde jokes when a blonde woman in the fourth row stands on her chair and starts shouting: more...

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It takes balls to be a transvestite.

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A construction site boss was interviewing men for a job, when along came Boudreaux. The boss thought to himself, "I'm not hiring that lazy Cajun," so he decided to set a test for Boudreaux hoping he wouldn't be able to answer the questions and he'd be able to refuse more...

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