"ADULT Adventures In Camelot" joke

King Arthur was getting ready to go on a Quest. He was worried about leaving his beautiful Queen Guinevere alone with all those lonely knights of the Round Table. So he went to his famous wizard, Merlin, for some advice. After explaining his predicament to Merlin, the wizard looked thoughtful and said to come back in a week and he'd see if he could come up with something.

A week later King Arthur was back in Merlin's laboratory where the good wizard was showing him his latest invention. It was a chastity belt... except it had a rather large hole in the most obvious place.' This is no good, Merlin!' the king exclaimed,' Look at this opening. How is this supposed to protect m'lady, the Queen?'

'Ah, sire, just observe.' said Merlin as he searched his cluttered workbench until he found what he was looking for. He then selected his most worn out wand, one that he was going to discard anyway. He then inserted it in the gaping aperture of the chastity belt whereupon a small guillotine blade came down and cut it neatly in two.

'Merlin, you are a genius!' said the grateful monarch,' Now I can leave, knowing that my Queen is fully protected.' After putting Guinevere in the device, King Arthur then set out upon his Quest.

Several years passed until he returned to Camelot. Immediately he assembled all his knights in the courtyard and had them drop their trousers for an informal' short arm' inspection. Sure enough! Each and every one of them was either amputated or damaged in some way. All of them except Sir Lancelot.

'Sir Lancelot,' exclaimed King Arthur,' The one and only true knight! Only you among all the nobles have been true to me. What is it in my power to grant you? Name it and it is yours!'

But Sir Lancelot was speechless...

The wives of four world leaders were having' tea' and the topic was raised of what one diplomatically calls a gentleman's manhood in their language.

Tony Blair's wife said in England people call it a gentleman, because it stands up when women are more...


This guy who was only 5'3 was going to have sex with this girl at this party one night so they found a room and as soon as the girl had all of her clothes off she tells the guy. now i want you to give me nine inches and you better make it hurt. so the guy fucked her three times more...


It was time for Father John's Saturday night bath, and young nun, Sister Magdalene had prepared the bath water and towels just the way the old nun had instructed.
Sister Magdalene was also instructed not to look at Fr. John's nakedness if she could help it, do whatever he more...


One day at the veterinarian's office where I take my cat, a man and the receptionist were verbally sparring.
After a few moments a technician came to her co-worker's defense.
"Sir... Do you know what happens to aggressive males in this office ??"

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