Yorkers Jokes

Q: How many New Yorkers does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: 50. 50? Yeah 50; its in the contract.

Q: How many New Yorkers does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: Five - one to change the bulb and four to protect him from muggers.

Q: How many New Yorkers does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: 21 - one to change it and 20 to watch it happen without trying to stop it.

Q: How many New Yorkers does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: Two-one to get murdered under the burnt-out bulb and the other to replace it after the ensuing publicity.

Q: How many polite, considerate native New Yorkers does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: Both of them.

Q: How many Yorkshiremen does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: Four. One to change it, one to hold his racing pigeon, one to hold his greyhound, and one to drink his pint of bitter.

Q: How many programmers does it take to change a more...

Joey Chestnut ate 45 slices of pizza in 10 minutes to win the world's first Pizza Eating Championship in Manhattan. New Yorkers haven't seen a mouth that big since Stephon Marbury. The contest is particularly difficult, because competitors have to listen to New Yorkers talk incessantly about how much better their pizza is.

One day at the entrance to heaven, St. Peter saw a New York street gang.
walk up to the Pearly Gates. This being a first, St. Peter ran to God and said, "God,
there are some evil, thieving New Yorkers at the Pearly Gates. What do I do?".
God replied, "Just do what you normally do with that type. Re-direct them down to hell."
St. Peter went back to carry out the order and all of a sudden he comes running back yelling "God, God, they`re gone, they`re gone!"
"Who, the New Yorkers?".
"No, the Pearly Gates."

One day at the entrance to heaven, St. Peter saw a New York street gang. walk up to the Pearly Gates. This being a first, St. Peter ran to God and said, “God, there are some evil, thieving New Yorkers at the Pearly Gates. What do I do? ”. God replied, “Just do what you normally do with that type. Re-direct them down to hell. ” St. Peter went back to carry out the order and all of a sudden he comes running back yelling “God, God, they’re gone, they’re gone! ” “Who, the New Yorkers? ”. “No, the Pearly Gates. ”

One day at the entrance to heaven, St. Peter saw a New York street gang.

walk up to the Pearly Gates. This being a first, St. Peter ran to God and said, "God,

there are some evil, thieving New Yorkers at the Pearly Gates. What do I do?".

God replied, "Just do what you normally do with that type. Re-direct them down to hell."

St. Peter went back to carry out the order and all of a sudden he comes running back yelling "God, God, they`re gone, they`re gone!"

"Who, the New Yorkers?".

"No, the Pearly Gates."