Wheels Jokes / Recent Jokes
Once upon a time, there was a cat who died. When she got to heaven, God asked her how she liked being on earth. She told the Lord that it was awful - she had to sleep in cold back alleys, where there was no food and life was hard. God told her that he was sorry it had had turned out that way - but here, in heaven, she would be happy and He would give her the most comfortable, warm pillow to sleep on. The cat laid down upon the pillow and was happy. A few days later, about a dozen mice that came to heaven together and God asked them how they had liked earth. The earth was no better for them than it was the cat. They explained to God that it was tough and exhausting and their feet were worn out from always running from cats and dogs and people. God felt bad for the mice and decided to give them rollerskates. One day God sees the cat again and asked her how she was liking heaven. She explained that it was absolutely wonderful. The pillow he gave her was the most comfortable place that more...
One day, a cat dies of natural causes and goes to heaven, where he meets the Lord. The Lord says to the cat, "You lived a good life, and if there is any way I can make your stay in heaven more comfortable, please let me know." The cat thinks for a moment and says, "Lord, all my life I have lived with a poor family and had to sleep on a hard wooden floor." The Lord stops the cat and says, "Say no more," and a wonderful, fluffy pillow appears. A few days later, six mice are killed in a tragic farming accident, and all of them go to heaven. Again, the Lord is there to greet them with the same offer. The mice answer, "All our lives we have been chased. We have had to run from cats, dogs, and even women with brooms. Running, running, running; we're tired of running. Do you think we could have roller skates so that we don't have to run anymore?" The Lord says, "Say no more" and fits each mouse with beautiful new roller skates. About a week more...
Your stomach growls when you don't eat rice for a day. You believe kecap ABC could turn bad cooking to gourmet food. You think our country is a democracy. You talk during a movie. You use a bucket instead of toilet paper in the bathroom. You eat fried rice in the morning. You prefer Versace or Moschino jeans over Gap or Levi's. You don't think Jim Carrey is funny. You think Onky Alexander is a hunk. You think Rhoma Irama is kampungan. You carry a 16 oz. jar of sambal to where ever you travel. Driving a car that is cheaper than $15, 000 embarrasses you. You think dangdut is stupid, but listen to it anyways, because you are homesick. You are willing to travel 25 miles to buy tahu and tempe. You are "Dreaming of a WARM Christmas". You are very good at avoiding potholes and other road hazards. Your local McDonald's serves rice and sambal. You think Supermi is a staple food. You have ever tried passing a Rp 50 coin as a quarter in a US vending machine/pay phone. You have ever more...
You always buy the latest cell phone equipped with WAP, screen savers, etc. although youll use it mainly to send SMSs. You set the ring tone of your cell phone as loud as possible. You spend your weekends at an expensive five star hotel near your house. You have one of those gigantic 5000 watts stereo system even though you cant turn it as loud as you can since you live in a crowded neighborhood. Your Toyota Kijang is packed with bull bar, fog lights, roof rail, car alarm, expensive car audio, gold plated emblems, tail light protector, racing steering wheels, sports muffler, lowered suspension, 17 inch wheels with expensive tires, etc. Yet you find them not gaul enough. You are able to squeeze 15 passengers in your Toyota Kijang. If youre rich, you buy a huge 50. 000 dollars imported SUV and demands it to run minimal 12 kilometers with a liter of gas. You refuse to buy unleaded gas for your imported car even though it costs less than 20 cents a liter. You have your drivers license at more...
A man was looking to hire a driver for a bus tour business. Three men applied for the job. He calls one into his office to interview him. The man says that he can put the wheels right on the edge of a bridge, drive, and not fall off. The employer is very impressed. He calls another man in. This man says that he can put the wheels halfway off of a bridge, drive, and not fall off. The employer is again very impressed. He calls the last man in. He says, "I heard what the other two guys said, and I don't think I could match them. I usually drive in the middle of a bridge".
After seeing a documentary on how inner city youths can removethe wheels of cars in under 4 seconds with no specialistequipment, the McLaren team decided to fire their pit crew andhire four of the youths as most races can be won or lost in thepit lane. The first race came along and the car came into the pits. Theyouths went to work but the McLaren team boss noticed a realproblem. Not only had the youths replaced all four wheels within fourseconds, but within 10 seconds, theyd re-sprayed and re-numbered the car and sold it to the Ferrari Team!