Trouble Jokes / Recent Jokes

A man named Dave finds himself in dire trouble. His business has gone bankrupt and he's in serious financial trouble. He's so desperate that he turns to God for help and begins to pray... "Please help me, God. I've lost my business and if I don't get some money soon, I'm going to lose my house as well. Please let me win the lotto."
Lotto night comes and he doesn't win.
Again, he prays... "God, please let me win the lotto. I've already lost my business, my house, and now I'm going to lose my car too."
Lotto night comes and still he has no luck.
Once again, he prays... "Dear Lord, why have you forsaken me? I've lost my business, my house and my car. My family is starving. I don't ask you for help often and I've always been a good servant to you. PLEASE, just let me win the lotto this one time so I will be able to get my life back in order."
Suddenly there is a blinding flash of light as the heavens open and Dave is confronted by the more...

Five cannibals get appointed as programmers in an IT company. During the welcoming ceremony the boss says: "Youre all part of our team now. You can earn good money here, and you can go to the company canteen for something to eat. So dont trouble the other employees."The cannibals promise not to trouble the other employees. Four weeks later the boss returns and says: "Youre all working very hard, and Im very satisfied with all of you. One of our cleaners has disappeared however. Do any of you know what happened to her?"The cannibals disavow all knowledge of the missing cleaner. After the boss has left, the leader of the cannibals says to the others: "Which of you idiots ate the cleaner?"A hand raises hesitantly, to which the leader of the cannibals says: "You fool! For four weeks weve been eating Team Leaders, Managers, and Project Managers so no-one would notice anything, and you have to go and eat the cleaner!"

A man had a problem sleeping at night, and thought it may be his conscience troubling him. He knew that he had been less than honest when filling in his tax return, and maybe that was the trouble.

So he sent a check to the Taxation Department with a note that said: "Dear Sir, I have not filled in all my income for which I should have paid tax. Therefore, here is my check for $100-00 - AND IF MY CONSCIENCE STILL TROUBLES ME, I WILL SEND YOU THE REST."

santa singh finds himself in dire trouble. His business has gone bust and he's in serious financial trouble. He's so desperate that he decides to ask Bhagwan for help. He goes into the temple and begins to pray.
"Oh Bhagwan, please help me, I've lost my business and if I don't get some money, I'm going to lose my house as well, please let me win the lotto". Lotto night comes and somebody else wins it.
The Sardarji goes back to the synagogue. "Bhagwan, please let me win the lotto, I've lost my business, my house and I'm going to lose my car as well". Lotto night comes and the Sardarji still has no luck!!
Back to the temple... "My Bhagwan, why have you forsaken me? I've lost my business, my house, my car and my wife and children are starving. I don't often ask you for help and I have always been a good servant to you. Why won't you just let me win the lotto this one time so I can get my life back in order???".
Suddenly there is a blinding more...

This is a true story from the WordPerfect helpline. Needless to say the helpdesk employee was fired; however, he/she is currently suing the WordPerfect organization for "Termination without Cause". Actual dialogue of a former Wordperfect Customer Support employee:
"Ridge Hall computer assistant; may I help you?"
"Yes, well, I'm having trouble with WordPerfect."
"What sort of trouble?"
"Well, I was just typing along, and all of a sudden the words went away"
"Went away?"
"They disappeared."
"Hmm. So what does your screen look like now?"
"Nothing."
"Nothing?"
"It's blank; it won't accept anything when I type."
"Are you still in WordPerfect, or did you get out?"
"How do I tell?"
"Can you see the C: prompt on the screen?"
"What's a sea-prompt?"
"Never mind. Can you move the more...

This is a true story from the WordPerfect helpline. Needless to say, the help desk employee was fired; however, he/she is currently suing the Word Perfect organization for "Termination without Cause."
Actual dialogue of a former WordPerfect Customer Support employee with a caller:
"Ridge Hall computer assistant; may I help you?"
"Yes, well, I'm having trouble with WordPerfect."
"What sort of trouble?"
"Well, I was just typing along, and all of a sudden the words went away."
"Went away?"
"They disappeared."
"Hmm. So what does your screen look like now?"
"Nothing."
"Nothing?"
"It's blank; it won't accept anything when I type."
"Are you still in WordPerfect, or did you get out?"
"How do I tell?"
"Can you see the C: prompt on the screen?"
"What's a sea-prompt?"
"Never mind. more...

This is a true story from the WordPerfect helpline. Needless, to say the helpdesk employee was fired: however, he/she is currently suing the WordPerfect organization for "Termination without Cause."
Actual dialog of a former WordPerfect Customer Support Employee: "Ridge Hall computer assistant; may I help you?" "Yes, well, I'm having trouble with WordPerfect."
"What sort of trouble?" "Well, I was just typing along, and all of a sudden the words went away."
"Went away?" "They disappeared."
"Hmm. So what does your screen look like now?" "Nothing."
"Nothing?" "It's blank; it won't accept anything when I type."
"Are you still in WordPerfect, or did you get out?" "How do I tell?"
"Can you see the c:prompt on the screen?" "What's a sea-prompt?"
"Never mind. Can you move the cursor around on the more...