Tax Advisor And Auditor Jokes

How many tax auditors does it take to find a $1. 00 mistake in an expense report?

Three. One to find the mistake and two to discuss the significance of it.

The income-tax inspectors are notorious around the world. This one was reported in the Financial Times, London.

This tax inspector went back to his office one night and found a burglar rifling his safe. After a fierce struggle the intruder managed to break away and run off.

The taxman telephoned the police, and half an hour later they rang back to tell him that they had caught the man and found $30 in his pockets. "I know," he said. "He had $45 on him when he broke in."

The difference between the short and long income tax forms is simple. If you use the short form, the government gets your money. If you use the long form, the tax advisor gets your money.

A couple of weeks after hearing a sermon on Psalms 51: 2-4 (knowing my own hidden secrets) and Psalm 52: 3-4 (lies and deceit), a man wrote the following letter to the IRS:

"I have been unable to sleep, knowing that I have cheated on my income tax. I understated my taxable income, and have enclosed a check for $150.
If I still can't sleep, I will send the rest."

What is the difference between tax avoidance and tax evasion? The jail walls.