Tallis Jokes / Recent Jokes

Menachem needs his tallis dry-cleaned. He sends it to the best dry cleaner in town, Ho Chi Wung Cleaners.
They tell him to come back in a week.
When he comes back, they give him the bill, which says $50.00.
"Fifty dollars to clean my tallis?!", Menachem reads, astonished.
"No, no, no!" replies the dry-cleaner. "Five dollars to clean tallis, forty-five dollars to take out all knots!

A man walks into a shul with a dog. The shammas comes up to him and says, "Pardon me, this is a House of Worship, you can't bring your dog in here."
"What do you mean," says the man, "this is a Jewish dog. Look."
And the shammas looks carefully and sees that in the same way that a St. Bernard carries a brandy barrel round its neck this dog has a tallis bag round its neck.
"Rover," says the man, "daven!".
"Woof!" says the dog, stands on his hind legs, opens the tallis bag, takes out a kipa and puts it on his head.
"Woof!" says the dog, stands on his hind legs, opens the tallis bag, takes out a tallis and puts it round his neck.
"Woof!" says the dog, stands on his hind legs, opens the tallis bag, takes out a siddur and starts to daven.
"That's fantastic," says the shammas, "absolutely amazing, incredible! You should take him to Hollywood, get him on television, get more...

Rosh Hashana was over and there was time until Yom Kippur, and Abie needed his tallis cleaned. He called his friend Max to ask what dry cleaner to take it to.
Max said, "I always take my tallis to Moishe the dry cleaner on W 4th. He only charges $4.00"
So Abie goes over to Moishe's and finds that the ownership has changed. He asks the new owner, Mr Jones, if he meets the old prices. Mr. Jones assures him that he does. Three days later, Abie goes to get his tallis and is given a bill for $24.00.
He storms at Mr Jones. "I thought you met Moishe's prices?"
"I did, " said Mr Jones, "$4.00 for the tallis, and $20.00 to get all the knots out of the fringes!"

The dry cleaners
Jacob needs his tallis cleaned, so he takes it to the best dry-cleaners in Golders Green, Yu Feng Zo Cleaners. They tell him to come back in a week. When he returns, they give him the tallis and an invoice for £50.
"Fifty pounds to clean just one small tallis?" Jacob says.
"No," replies Yu Feng, "Five pounds to clean the tallis, fourty five pounds to take out all those knots!"