Superintendent Jokes

A candidate brought dice into the examination hall for MCQ. He started tossing the dice to select his answers. The superintendent just gave a glimpse at this candidate, as he passed by, as it is common to have students trying their luck. Very soon the candidate finished his whole paper and slept on his table. Half an hour later, the candidate sat up, and started tossing the dice again The superintendent felt curious, and approached the candidate.
Superintendent: "Gentleman, why are you tossing the dice again, since you've already finished all the questions earlier on?"
Candidate: "Sir, I have to double check my answers"

From: General Manager
To: Departmental Heads
''On Friday evening at 5 p.m., Halley's Comet will be visible in this area—an event which occurs only once every 76 years. Please have the employees assemble in the park area outside the building and I will explain this rare phenomenon to them. In case of rain, we will not be able to see anything, so assemble the employees in the canteen and I will show them a film of it.''
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From: Departmental Heads
To: Deputy Departmental Heads
''By order of the General Manager on Friday at 5p.m., Halley's Comet will appear above the area outside the building. If it rains, please assemble the employees and proceed to the canteen, where this rare phenomenon will take place, something which occurs only every 76 years''
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From: Deputy Departmental Heads
To: Superintendent
''By the order of the General Manager, at 5 p.m. on Friday, the more...

A senior official of a ministry decided to spend a whole day in one of the departments under him. He got there before the office opened and noted that many of the staff came in half an hour or an hour after opening time. He sent for the superintendent and told him to warn the staff that anyone coming late in the future would be penalised.
In the evening he saw many clerks leaving office early. He again sent for the superintendent and rebuked him:' What is going on in your office? So many clerks come late and leave early!'
'Sir, they don't want to be late twice on the same day/ replied the superintendent.

The local political leader was invited to speak to the inmates of a mental asylum.
The politician had begun his talk and had been going for about ten minutes when a fellow in the back stood up and yelled, "Oh, you don't know what you are talking about! Besides, you are talking too much. Why don't you shut up and sit down!"
"I will wait a minute until you put that man out," the politician said to the superintendent.
"Put him out?" the superintendent asked.
"Certainly not! That poor man has been here for eight years and that is the first time he has ever said anything that made any sense, sir."

A Sunday school class had been carefully drilled for the coming of a very important visitor - the district superintendent. Johnnie was follower "God," in re ponse to the question, "Who made you." Jimmy was to pipe up with "Out of the dust of the eartth," in response to the second question "With what did He make you?" The great day of the review arrived, and as planed the superintendent asked the class, "Who made you?" After a silence of a few seconds, the question was repeated, "Who made you?" "Please, Sir," spoke up a freckle faced youngster in the front, "the little boy God made is home with the measles."