Sung Jokes / Recent Jokes

Having been raised a Catholic and having gone to church some time in my past, I think these are still verifiable!
AMEN: The only part of a prayer that everyone knows.
BULLETIN:
1. Parish information read only during the homily.
2. Catholic air conditioning.
3. Your receipt for attending Mass.
CHOIR: A group of people whose singing allows the rest of the Congregation to lip-sync.
HOLY WATER: A liquid whose chemical formula is H2OLY.
HYMN: A song of praise, usually sung in a key three octaves higher than that of the congregation's range.
RECESSIONAL HYMN: The last song at Mass, often sung a little more quietly, since most of the people have already left.
INCENSE: Holy Smoke!
JESUITS: An order of priests known for their ability to found colleges with good basketball teams.
JONAH: The original "Jaws" story.
JUSTICE: When kids have kids of their own.
KYRIE ELIEISON: The only Greek words that most Catholics can recognize more...

Victor, after a long, hard days work, decides he needs some relaxation, so he goes to his local brothel. He enters and finds the Madame. As it's the busiest time of the day, there is only one girl left, who is Chinese and doesn't know a word of English. "I'll take her," He says desperately, as he is also in a hurry. So they proceed upstairs and get down to business. As Victor is going full whack the girl begins to shout out, "Sung wa! Sung wa!" To which Victor assumes that this means, great, fantastic, etc, so he continues unperturbed.
The following day he is at a golf meeting with a wealthy, prospective Chinese client, and is trying to impress him in any way he can. Just then the client T's off and gets a hole in one. This gives Victor the opportunity to use his newly found Chinese phrase... "Sung wa! Sung wa!" He yells out. To
which the client replies, "Wrong hole? What do you mean wrong hole?"

To be sung to the tune of "Day-O (The Banana Boat Song)"
Day-O... oh Day-O,
Air force come and they flatten your home
Run Mr Taliban, we know where you`re hiding,
Air force come and they flatten your home
Hey USA, USA, USA...
Air force come and they flatten you home
60ft, 70ft, 80ft craters,
Air force come and they flatten your home
Old Uncle Sam`s pissed, he ain`t no quitter,
Air force come and they flatten your home
When we finish you all be crying,
Air force come and they flatten your home,
Pilot is brother of New York fireman
Air force come and they flatten your home