Spiritual Jokes / Recent Jokes
New Rule: Stop giving me that pop-up ad for classmates. com!
There's a reason you don't talk to people for 25 years. Because you don't particularly like them! Besides, I already know what the captain of the football team is doing these days: mowing my lawn.
New Rule: Don't eat anything that's served to you out a window unless you're a seagull. People are acting all shocked that a human finger was found in a bowl of Wendy's chili. Hey, it cost less than a dollar. What did you expect it to contain? Trout?
New Rule: Stop saying that teenage boys who have sex with their hot, blonde teachers are permanently damaged. I have a better description for these kids: lucky bastard.
New Rule: Ladies, leave your eyebrows alone. Here's how much men care about your eyebrows: do you have two of them? Okay, we're done.
New Rule: There's no such thing as flavored water. There's a whole aisle of this crap at the supermarket, water, but without that watery taste. Sorry, but flavored more...
The Pope and a lawyer find themselves together before the Pearly Gates. After a small quantum of time which was spent discussing their respective professions, ol' St. Peter shows up to usher them to their new Heavenly station. After passing out wings, harps, halos and such, St. Pete decides to show them to their new lodgings. Only a brief flight from the welcome, Pete brings them down on the front lawn (cloud-encrusted, natch) of a huge palatial estate with all sorts of lavish trappings. This, Pete announces, is where the lawyer will be spending eternity, (at least until the end of time..) "Hot Dang", the Pope says to His-self, "If he's getting a place like this, I can hardly wait to see my digs!". They take flight once again, and as Pete leads on, the landscape below begins to appear more and more mundane until they finally land on a street lined with Brownstone houses. Pete indicates the third walkup on the left as the Popes new domicile and turns to leave, more...
The Pope and a lawyer find themselves together before the Pearly Gates.
After a small quantum of time which was spent discussing their respective professions, ol' St. Peter shows up to usher them to their new Heavenly station.
After passing out wings, harps, halos and such, St. Pete decides to show them to their new lodgings.
Only a brief flight from the welcome, Pete brings them down on the front lawn (cloud-encrusted, natch) of a huge palatial estate with all sorts of lavish trappings.
This, Pete announces, is where the lawyer will be spending eternity, (at least until the end of time..)
"Hot Dang", the Pope says to His-self, "If he's getting a place like this, I can hardly wait to see my digs!".
They take flight once again, and as Pete leads on, the landscape below begins to appear more and more mundane until they finally land on a street lined with Brownstone houses.
Pete indicates the third walkup on the left as the Popes new more...
With regards to his affair with Argentine divorcee Maria Belen Chapur, Governor Mark Sanford's spiritual advisor Warren "Cubby" Culbertson described Sanford as being "gripped by darkness."
Naturally, Chapur herself blushed to learn that her daily Kegel exercises were a topic of discussion in Sanford's spiritual group.