Spend Jokes / Recent Jokes

In prison you spend the majority of your time in an 8' X 10' cell. At work you spend most of your time in a 6' X 8' cubicle.
In prison you get three meals a day. At work you only get a break for one meal and you have to pay for that one.
In prison you get time off for good behavior. At work you get rewarded for good behavior with more work.
At work you must carry around a security card and unlock and open all the doors yourself. In prison a guard locks and unlocks all the doors for you.
In prison you can watch TV and play games. At work you get fired for watching TV and playing games.
In prison they ball-and-chain you when you go somewhere. At work you are just ball-and-chained.
In prison you get your own room. At work you have to share.
In prison they allow your family and friends to visit. At work you cannot even speak to your family and friends.
In prison all expenses are paid by taxpayers, with no work required. At work you get to pay all the more...

In prison you spend the majority of your time in an 8 X 10 cell.
At work you spend most of your time in a 6 X 8 cubicle.
In prison you get 3 meals a day.
At work you get a break for 1 meal and you have to pay for it.
In prison you get time off for good behavior.
At work you get rewarded for good behavior with more work.
In prison you can watch TV and play games.
At work you get fired for watching TV and playing games.
In prison a guard locks & unlocks, opens & closes the doors for you.
At work you must carry a security card and unlock & open doors yourself.
In prison you have your own toilet.
At work you have to share.
In prison they allow you to visit your family and friends.
At work you can't even speak to family and friends.
In prison all expenses are paid by taxpayers, with no work required.
At work, you get to pay all the expenses to go to work and then they deduct taxes from your salary to pay for the more...

In prison you spend the majority of your time in an 8' X 10' cell.
At work you spend most of your time in a 6' X 8' cubicle.
In prison you get three meals a day.
At work you only get a break for one meal and you have to pay for that one.
In prison you get time off for good behavior.
At work you get rewarded for good behavior with more work.
At work you must carry around a security card and unlock and open all the doors yourself.
In prison a guard locks and unlocks all the doors for you.
In prison you can watch TV and play games.
At work you get fired for watching TV and playing games.
In prison they ball-and-chain you when you go somewhere.
At work you are just ball-and-chained.
In prison you get your own room.
At work you have to share.
In prison they allow your family and friends to visit.
At work you cannot even speak to your family and friends.
In prison all expenses are paid by taxpayers, with no work more...

In prison you spend the majority of your time in an 8' X 10' cell.
At work you spend most of your time in a 6' X 8' cubicle.
In prison you get three meals a day.
At work you only get a break for one meal and you have to pay for that one.
In prison you get time off for good behaviour.
At work you get rewarded for good behaviour with more work.
At work you must carry around a security card and unlock and open all the doors yourself.
In prison a guard locks and unlocks all the doors for you.
In prison you can watch TV and play games.
At work you get fired for watching TV and playing games.
In prison they ball-and-chain you when you go somewhere.
At work you are just ball-and-chained.
In prison you get your own loo.
At work you have to share.
In prison they allow your family and friends to visit.
At work you cannot even speak to your family and friends.
In prison all expenses are paid by taxpayers, with no work more...

In prison you spend the majority of your time in an 8' X 10' cell.At work you spend most of your time in a 6' X 8' cubicle.In prison you get three meals a day.At work you only get a break for one meal and you have to pay for that one.In prison you get time off for good behavior.At work you get rewarded for good behavior with more work.At work you must carry around a security card and unlock and open all the doors yourself.In prison a guard locks and unlocks all the doors for you.In prison you can watch TV and play games.At work you get fired for watching TV and playing games.In prison they ball-and-chain you when you go somewhere.At work you are just ball-and-chained.In prison you get your own room.At work you have to share.In prison they allow your family and friends to visit.At work you cannot even speak to your family and friends.In prison all expenses are paid by taxpayers, with no work required.At work you get to pay all the expenses to go to work and then they deduct taxes from more...

IN PRISON...You spend the majority of your time in an 8x10 cell. AT WORK... You spend most of your time in a 6x8 cubicle.
IN PRISON...You get three meals a day. AT WORK... You only get a break for 1 meal and you have to pay for it.
IN PRISON...You get time off for good behavior. AT WORK... You get rewarded for good behavior with more work.
IN PRISON...A guard locks and unlocks all the doors for you. AT WORK... You must carry around a security card and unlock and open all the doors yourself.
IN PRISON...You can watch TV and play games. AT WORK... You get fired for watching TV and playing games.
IN PRISON...You get your own toilet. AT WORK... You have to share.
IN PRISON...They allow your family and friends to visit. AT WORK... You cannot even speak to your family and friends.
IN PRISON...All expenses are paid by taxpayers with no work required. AT WORK... You get to pay all the expenses to go to work and then they deduct taxes from your salary to pay for more...

One day while walking down the street a highly successful partner in a law firm was tragically hit by a bus and she died. Her soul arrived up in heaven where she was met at the Pearly Gates by St. Peter himself.

“Welcome to Heaven, ” said St. Peter. “Before you get settled in though, it seems we have a problem. You see, strangely enough, we’ve never once had an law firm partner make it this far and we’re not really sure what to do with you. ”

“No problem, just let me in, ” said the woman.

“Well, I’d like to, but I have higher orders. What we’re going to do is let you have a day in Hell and a day in Heaven and then you can choose whichever one you want to spend an eternity in. ”

“Actually, I think I’ve made up my mind…I prefer to stay in Heaven”, replied the woman.

“Sorry, we have rules…” And with that St. Peter put the law partner in an elevator and which slowly descended to the depths of more...