Shy Jokes / Recent Jokes

Whats a shy and retiring accountant? An accountant who is half a million shy and thats why hes retiring.

A few beans short of chili.

A few beers short of a six-pack / a six-pack short of a case.

A few birds shy of a flock.

A few blocks short of a filesystem.

A few bombs/melons short of a full load.

A few bricks short of a wall / hod / load / pile.

A few chips short of a cookie.

A few clowns short of a circus.

A few clues shy of a solution.

A few cold solder joints.

A few ears short of a bushel.

A few feathers short of a whole duck.

A few few cylinders short of a full re-format.

A few fish short of a string.

A few french fries / one hamburger short of a Happy Meal.

1. MILKING IT: When stroking a guy's dick don't grab it like a bus rail and start jerking it like you were milking a cow. Don't use the penis as if it's a piece of gym equipment to strengthen the forearms. The male organ is a thing of wonder and beauty, and should be worshipped and held tenderly at all times. The sensitive part is at the top (where your face should be), not two-thirds of the way down.

2. BEING NAKED: Very few female bodies are good to look it so please make an effort to cover up as much as possible with exotic lingerie. Match the outfit to suit your bod. If you've got a half-decent arse but no tits for example, wear stockings and suspenders and cover your meagre mammaries with something silky.

3. POOR PRESENTATION: Presentation is all important. Don't wait to be asked to get it doggy-style. Roll over and present. You know you love it!

4. SILENT FRIGHT: If you've come and cannot be arsed to scream to show your appreciation, at least more...

Aarons are dependable and talented.
Allens are preppy.
Alexes like porno, usually hot in a skater kinda way
Everyone has an Andy.
Bens are the smart, silent type.
Bills are the ones everyone chases and no one gets to keep.
Bob is the universal name.
Brads try too hard.
Brandons are dark haired, players.
Bretts are shy and clumsy.
Brians usually have only one good feature (but I haven't quite found it yet)
Calebs never grow up.
Carters are rich, power-hungry snobs.
Chads are hot, quiet but interesting once you get inside.
Charlies are walking sex.
Chris' are undefined and should remain so.
Craigs are a little misguided.
Dans are thick.
Daves are impossible to get over.
Dennis' are quiet, desperate flirts.
Devons are destined for trouble.
Doug is the nice guy that repulses you.
Eds are thbp
Eddies are fast.
Erics are forgettable.
Ethans smell.
Franks and more...

Q: Why did the weather want privacy?
A: It was changing.