Seeing-eye Jokes / Recent Jokes

Two men who are out walking their dogs meet on a streetcorner.
One says to the other, "Boy it sure is hot today. I'd really like to go into the bar and get a beer, but the sign on the front door says, 'No Pets Allowed,' and I can't leave Fido alone on the street."
The other man replies, "No problem, just stand by the door and watch me, and you'll be having that beer real soon!"
The second man reaches into his pocket and puts on a pair of dark sunglasses, and then walks into the bar. The bartender looks up and says, "Hey buddy, you can't bring that dog in here!"
The man says, "But I'm blind, and this is my seeing-eye dog!"
The bartender says, "Oh, OK then." The man drinks his beer and leaves.
The first man then puts on dark sunglasses and goes into the bar. The bartender looks up and says, "Hey buddy, you can't bring that dog in here!"
The man says, "But I'm blind, and this is my seeing-eye more...

Two guys, one with a Doberman and the other with a Chihuahua, were taking a walk. As they strolled down the street, the guy with the Doberman said to his friend, "Let's go over to that bar and have something to drink."
The guy with the Chihuahua replied, "We can't go in there. We have our dogs with us."
The one with the Doberman said, "Just follow my lead." They walked over to the bar and the guy with the Doberman put on a pair of dark glasses and started to walk into the bar.
"Sorry, buddy, no pets allowed," the bouncer at the door said.
The man with the Doberman said, "You don't understand. This is my seeing-eye dog."
"A Doberman?" the bouncer asked skeptically.
"Yes, they're using them now," the man replied. "They're actually quite good."
"Ok then, come on in," said the bouncer.
The guy with the Chihuahua decided he'd try it too, so he put on a pair of dark more...

A policeman directing traffic at a busy city intersection one afternoon observed a blind man with his seeing-eye dog waiting to cross the street.
All of a sudden, the policeman was aghast at the sight of the seeing-eye dog bolting out into the street in front of heavy traffic at one of the busiest intersections in the whole city, dragging the blind man along with the dog's leash in the blind man's hands while cars were trying to stop, screeching their brakes and swerving to avoid a fatal accident.
The policeman was absolutely horrified, but could do nothing to assist. To the immediate relief of the horrified police officer, the blind man and his dog somehow made it across the street without suffering any harm to themselves whatsoever. It was a miracle!
The police officer, still in shock, observed the blind man, upon reaching the corner sidewalk after having nearly been killed crossing the street, reach into his pocket and pull out a cookie and offer it to his seeing-eye more...

A man goes to a bar with his dog. He goes up to the bar and asks for a drink. The bartender says "You can''t bring that dog in here!" The guy, without missing a beat, says "This is my seeing-eye dog." "Oh man, " the bartender says, "I''m sorry, here, the first one''s on me." The man takes his drink and goes to a table near the door.
Another guy walks in the bar with a Chihuahua. The first guys sees him, stops him and says "You can''t bring that dog in here unless you tell him it''s a seeing-eye dog." The second man graciously thanks the first man and continues to the bar. He asks for a drink. The bartender says "Hey, you can''t bring that dog in here!"
The second man replies "This is my seeing-eye dog." The bartender says, "No, I don''t think so. They do not have Chiwauas as seeing-eye dogs." The man pauses for a half-second and replies "What?!?! They gave me a Chihuahua?!?"

There's a guy with a Doberman Pinscher and a guywith a Chihuahua. The guy with the Doberman Pinschersays to the guy with a Chihuahua,' Let's go over tothat restaurant and get something to eat.' The guy with the Chihuahua says,' We can't go in there. We've got dogs with us.' The guy with the Doberman Pinscher says,' Just follow my lead.' They walk over to the restaurant, the guy with the DobermanPinscher puts on a pair of dark glasses, and he starts to walkin. A guy at the door says,' Sorry, mac, no pets allowed.' The guy with the Doberman Pinscher says,' You don't understand. This is my seeing-eye dog.' The guy at the door says,' A Doberman Pinscher?' He says,' Yes, they're using them now, they're very good.' The guy at the door says,' Come on in.' The guy with the Chihuahua figures,' What the hell,' so he putson a pair of dark glasses and starts to walk in. The guy at the door says,' Sorry, pal, no pets allowed.' The guy with the Chihuahua says,' You don't understand. This ismy more...