Screws Jokes / Recent Jokes

What is the similarity between air traffic controllers and pilots?
If a pilot screws up, the pilot dies; if ATC screws up, the pilot dies.

What has a bunch of balls and screws old ladies?
A bingo machine

A screw driver turns in screws and Clinton screws interns.

Q. What has one hundred balls and screws old ladies?
A. Bingo

Q. What has 75 balls and screws old ladies?
A. Bingo

What is the difference between Bill Clinton and a screwdriver?
One turns in screws...
The other screws interns!

Blue water Navy truism; There are more planes in the ocean than there are submarines in the sky.

If the wings are traveling faster than the fuselage, it's probably a helicopter -- and therefore, unsafe.

Navy carrier pilots to Air Force pilots: Flaring is like squatting to pee.

When one engine fails on a twin-engine airplane you always have enough power left to get you to
the scene of the crash.

Without ammunition the USAF would be just another expensive flying club.

What is the similarity between air traffic controllers and pilots? If a pilot screws up, the
pilot dies; If ATC screws up, the pilot dies.

Never trade luck for skill.

The three most common expressions (or famous last words) in aviation are: "Why is it doing that?",
"Where are we?" and "Oh S#!+!"

Weather forecasts are horoscopes with numbers.

Progress in airline flying; now a flight more...