Rockefeller Jokes

Christmas at New York City's Rockfeller Center will feature a tree from western New Jersey that its owners call a "miracle."

Workers are cutting down the 72-foot tall Norway spruce on the grounds of Tree King nursery in Hamilton, which is owned by the Varanyak family.

He says it's "the miracle tree" because his late mother always said it would one day be on display at Rockefeller Center.

His brother, Bob, says they recently saw a blue bird in the tree and they believe the bird was their mother guarding it.
________
Unfortunately, the blue bird was crushed by the falling tree, and its recently hatched chicks froze to death in the crisp, NJ air....but the tree is beautiful, and if you squint your eyes, tree rings on the stump almost look like Santa Claus.

Two old friends met one day after many years. One attended college, and now was very successful. The other had not attended college and never had much ambition.
The successful one said, "How has everything been going with you?"
"Well, one day I opened the Bible at random, and dropped my finger on a word and it was oil. So, I invested in oil, and boy, did the oil wells gush. Then another day I dropped my finger on another word and it was gold. So, I invested in gold and those mines really produced. Now, I'm as rich as Rockefeller."
The successful friend was so impressed that he rushed to his hotel, grabbed a Gideon Bible, flipped it open, and dropped his finger on a page. He opened his eyes and his finger rested on the words, "Chapter Eleven."

"If I were Rockefeller," sighed the Hebrew teacher from Chelm, "I'd be richer than Rockefeller."
His friend asked, "What do you mean? How could you be richer?"
"I'd do a little teaching on the side."