Pakistani Jokes / Recent Jokes

A man from Pakistan named Abdul was bragging that in his country there are 79 different ways to make mad passionate love.
A gent from Florida listened incredulously. "Why that's amazing. Where I come from there's only one way."
"Just one?" Abdul asked. "And which way is that?"
"Well," the Florida gent began, "there's a man and there's a woman--"
"Praise Allah!!" exclaims Abdul, "Number 80!"

A man goes into an adult entertainment shop and asks the assistant for an inflatable doll.
"Would you like male or female?"
"Female, please."
"Would you like Black, or White?"
"White, Please."
"Would you like Christian or Muslim?"
This question confused the man. .. and he replied,
"What has the religion got to do with it? It's an inflatable doll!"
"Well," explained the assistant, "The Pakistani one blows itself up!"

The following news item is taken from an English provincial paper.
'When a disaster occurs, the Red Cross Society is always glad to help - especially with money. But some gifts can cause embarrassment. When 200 cases of bras were sent as a well-meaning gift to Pakistan, the problem which they caused was solved by cutting them in half to make two rice bowls.'

After Benazir Bhutto died she wanted to get an entry into paradise.
She knocked on the gate. Knock, knock, knock. ..
After a long time an angel opened the door and said.' Sorry, Ms Bhutto, wrong floor; please go down the stairs.'
After a short while, Ms Bhutto was back again knocking furiously on the gate, shouting,' Let me in, let me in!'
'What's it now?' asked the angel politely.
'I demand political asylum!' thundered Ms Bhutto.

Three contractors. . . One from Pakistan, another from Germany and the third from England are bidding to repair the White House fence. A senior White House official takes them to examine it.
The English contractor: takes out a tape measure and does some measuring, then works on some figures with a pencil. "Well," he says. "I figure the job will cost $900. . . $400 for materials, $400 for labour and $100 profit for me."
The German contractor: also does some measuring and figuring, then says, "I can do this job for $700. . . $300 for materials, $300 for my crew and $100 profit for me."
The Pakistani contractor doesn`t measure or do any figuring, but leans over to the White House official and whispers: " $2, 700."
The official incredulously says, "You didn`t even measure like the other guys! How did you come up with such a high figure?"

"Easy," the Pakistani explains, "$1, 000 for you, $1, 000 more...

General Tikka Khan of Pakistan and his troops left behind a sizeable anthology of jokes in Bangladesh which are still recounted there. The pattern of those jokes is very much the same as those manufactured by the Jews under Hitlerite tyranny.
A farmer brought his prize rooster to sell in the market.' What do you feed that bird that he is so big?' asked a Pathan solider of the Pakistan army.'
'I feed it rice, sir,' replied the farmer.
'How dare you waste rice on the bird while we are short of food?' said the Pathan and seized the bird.
The next day the farmer brought another rooster to sell.' What do you feed that bird that he is so big?' demanded a Baluch soldier of the Pakistan army.
'Sir, I feed it with ghee,' replied the farmer.
'How dare your waste ghee on a bird while we are short of food!' swore the Baluchi as he seized the bird.
On the third day the poor farmer brought his last remaining rooster to the market. This time a Punjabi Mussalman more...

Some Sikhs and Pakistanis were in trenches facing one another. One Sikh shouted' Mohammed Mia'. A Pakistani soldier stood up and shouted,' Mohammed Mia ko kisne bulaya?' (Who called Mohammed Mia?) He got shot. Another Sikh shouted' Azam Khan' Azam Khan stood up and said. .. and got shot.
The Pakistanis found it a great idea and decided to copy it. (It is in their genes to do everything after the Indians!) So a Pakistani soldier shouted,' Swaran Singh'.
There was silence. After a cpuple of minutes one of the Sikhs shouted,' Swaran Singh ko kisne bulaya?' (Who called Swaran Singh?)
A Pakistani soldier stood up - and got shot!