Pakistani Jokes / Recent Jokes

Taliban militants threatened suicide attacks on Pakistani bus drivers who play American music on their buses saying that such entertainment was spreading "vulgarity and obscenity," Clay Aiken CDs have fallen off sharply.

One taxi driver in Lahore to another, "Did you hear that the Pakistan government bought a thousand septic tanks?"

The other driver replied, "Yes, and as soon as they learn to drive them, they're going to invade India."

This one comes from General Pervez Musharraf's trusted personal barber who had become infected by the popular demand for the restoration of democracy.
One morning, while clipping the president's hair he asked:' Gareeb pur war] When are you going to have elections in Pakistan?'
The president ignored the question with the contempt it deserved from a military dictator. At the next hair-cutting session, the barber asked:' Aalijahl Isn't it time you redeemed your promise to have elections?'
The president controlled his temper and remained silent.
At the third hair-clipping session the barber again blurted out:' Banda Nawaz, the awam (commofi people) are clamouring for elections; when will you order them?'
The president could not contain himself any longer and exploded:' Gaddaar I will have you taught a lesson you will never forget!' and he ordered his minions to take away the barber and give him ten lashes on his buttocks.
The barber fell at the'great man's more...

A mother narrates a dialogue between Zia-ul-Haq, former military ruler of Pakistan who declared himself the President, and his assistant in a plane. Said Zia,' If I throw a 100 rupee note, it v/>uld make at least the one Pakistani who found it happy again.'
'Ten 10 rupee notes would be a better idea,' replied his assistant.' They would make ten Pakistanis happy.'
The pilot who overheard the conversation butted
in, ' If I threw both of you out it would make
15 crore Pakistanis happy.'

Paki husband & wife come out of divorce court, woman starts crying, husband puts arm around her and says: "don't worry honey, we're still cousins."

There was a period during the Pakistan army's campaign of repression in East Pakistan, now Bangladesh, which was directed exclusively at the Hindus. Every Bangla Hindu tried to pass off as a Muslim. The Pakistan army couldn't be fooled that easily. During one of their pogroms, they lined up all the adults of the village.
'Name?' asked the officer.' Moosa Mian,' replied the man.
'lift up your tehmad.' Moosa Mian did as he was told. He was allowed to go.
The next one, a Hindu, was understandably nervous.' Name?' demanded the officer.
'Atul Bihari,' replied the man, shaking with fear.
'Why are you so scared?' demanded the officer.' We are not looking for Biharis but only Hindus.'

President General Pervez Musharaf preside over a cabinate meeting, he told the meeting that his government is doing great jobs for the poor peoples of pakistan, there are very much development in every where, and the peoples are glad to him, after the meeting a young minister visited all the sites and the areas which were told in the cabinate meeting by the pervez musharaff, but he found nothing, next time in the meeting he told the President Muzharaf that I visited every where but found nothing as you told, President saw the Minister and said" stay at home, do you job, dont go here and there, and read the official news papers and watch Ptv."