Oranges Jokes

  • Funny Jokes

    Question and the Answer given by Candidates, oh sorry they are IAS
    (Indian Administrative Services - THE most difficult examination in
    India . Candidates are graduate Officers now.

    Q. How can you drop a raw egg onto a concrete floor without cracking it?
    A. Concrete floors are very hard to crack! (UPSC Topper)

    Q. If it took eight men ten hours to build a wall, how long would it
    take four men to build it?
    A. No time at all it is already built. (UPSC 23 rd Rank Opted for IFS)

    Q. If you had three apples and four oranges in one hand and four
    apples and three oranges in the other hand, what would you have?
    A. Very large hands.(Good one) (UPSC 11 Rank Opted for IPS)

    Q. How can you lift an elephant with one hand?
    A. It is not a problem, since you will never find an elephant with
    one hand. (UPSC Rank 14 Opted for IES)

    Q. How can a man go eight days without sleep?
    A. No Probs, He sleeps at more...

    So there was a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead and they were running from the police but all they could find was a barn. They were in a hurry to hide so the brunette hid in the horse's stable, the redhead hid in a tree, and the blonde hid behind a few boxes of oranges. When the policemen came to the barn, they went to the horses stable and the policeman heard something.
    "Wait!" he said. "I hear breathing!"
    But the brunette went, "Neigh! Neigh!"
    "Oh, it's just a horse," the policeman said. Then he walked around and came upon a tree and heard breathing.
    "Stop!" he said. "I hear breathing in the tree!"
    "Caww! Caww!" went the redhead.
    "Oh, it's just a bird," said the policeman. Next, the policemen came upon a barn with a stack of boxes of oranges.
    "Wait!" Said the policeman. "I hear breathing!"
    Then the blonde said "I'm an orange! I'm an orange!"

    Lulu was a prostitute, but she didn't want her grandma to know.
    One day, the police raided a whole group of prostitutes at a sex party in a hotel, and Lulu was among them.
    The police took them outside and had all the girls line up along the driveway when suddenly, Lulu's grandma came by and saw her granddaughter.
    Grandma asked, "Why are you standing in line here, dear?"
    Not willing to let her grandmother know the truth, Lulu told her grandmother that the policemen were there passing out free oranges and she was just lining up for some.
    "Why, that's awfully nice of them. I think I'll get some for myself," and she proceeded to the back of the line.
    A policeman was going down the line asking for information from all of the hookers.
    When he got to Grandma, he was bewildered and exclaimed, "Wow, still going at it at your age? How do you do it?"
    Grandma replied, "Oh, it's easy, dear. I just take my dentures out, rip more...

    A middle-aged man had an obsession with women's breasts. So he went to a psychologist and told the doctor about his problem.

    "I am going to do word association," explained the doctor. "I am going to say a word, and you will say the first thing that come to your mind."

    "Oranges," said the doctor.

    "Breasts," replied the patient.






    "Breasts," said the patient with the same reply.

    "Wait a minute! I can see the connections between oranges, apples, watermelons and breasts. But automobile's wipers? Where is the connection?" asked the doctor.

    "Easy. .. one on the left and one on the right!"

    If oranges smell like chicken, why are tomatoes blue? Think about it!

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