Optometrist Jokes

Patient to optometrist: I'm very worried about the outcome of this operation, doctor. What are the chances?
Optometrist to patient: Don't worry, you won't be able to see the difference.

A leopard went to see an optometrist because he thought he needed an eye exam. "Every time I look at my wife," he worriedly told the optometrist, "I see spots before my eyes."

"So what's to worry about?" replied the doctor. "You're a leopard, aren't you?"

"What's that got to do with anything?" replied the patient. "My wife is a zebra."

Sobel goes into the optometrist's office. He opens the door and says to the receptionist, "I think I need my eyeschecked." She says, "You're not kidding. This is the Ladies Room."

Patient to optometrist: I'm very worried about the outcome of this operation, doctor. What are the chances? Optometrist to patient: Don't worry, you won't be able to see the difference.

Mr Wong goes to an optometrist to have his failing eyesight checked out.
The optometrist runs a battery of tests and comes to a conclusion.
'Mr Wong, I'm afraid you have a cataract'
He replies, 'No I don't - I drive lincoln town car!'