Mixture Jokes / Recent Jokes

Chocolate Chip Cookies: Ingredients: 1. 532. 35 cm3 gluten2. 4. 9 cm3 NaHCO33. 4. 9 cm3 refined halite4. 236. 6 cm3 partially hydrogenated tallow triglyceride5. 177. 45 cm3 crystalline C12H22O116. 177. 45 cm3 unrefined C12H22O117. 4. 9 cm3 methyl ether of protocatechuic aldehyde8. Two calcium carbonate-encapsulated avian albumen-coated protein9. 473. 2 cm3 theobroma cacao10. 236. 6 cm3 de-encapsulated legume meats (sieve size #10)To a 2-L jacketed round reactor vessel (reactor #1) with an overall heat transfer coefficient of about 100 Btu/F-ft2-hr, add ingredients one, two and three with constant agitation. In a second 2-L reactor vessel with a radial flow impeller operating at 100 rpm, add ingredients four, five, six, and seven until the mixture is homogenous. To reactor #2, add ingredient eight, followed by three equal volumes of the homogenous mixture in reactor #1. Additionally, add ingredient nine and ten slowly, with constant agitation. Care must be taken at this point in the more...

Chocolate Chip Cookies: Ingredients: 1.) 532. 35 cm3 gluten2.) 4. 9 cm3 NaHCO33.) 4. 9 cm3 refined halite4.) 236. 6 cm3 partially hydrogenated tallow triglyceride5.) 177. 45 cm3 crystalline C12H22O116.) 177. 45 cm3 unrefined C12H22O117.) 4. 9 cm3 methyl ether of protocatechuic aldehyde8.) Two calcium carbonate-encapsulated avian albumen-coated protein9.) 473. 2 cm3 theobroma cacao10.) 236. 6 cm3 de-encapsulated legume meats (sieve size #10)To a 2-L jacketed round reactor vessel (reactor #1) with an overall heat transfer coefficient of about 100 Btu/F-ft2-hr, add ingredients one, two and three with constant agitation. In a second 2-L reactor vessel with a radial flow impeller operating at 100 rpm, add ingredients four, five, six, and seven until the mixture is homogenous. To reactor #2, add ingredient eight, followed by three equal volumes of the homogenous mixture in reactor #1. Additionally, add ingredient nine and ten slowly, with constant agitation. Care must be taken at this point more...

Chocolate Chip Cookies:
Ingredients:

1. 532. 35 cm3 gluten

2. 4. 9 cm3 NaHCO3

3. 4. 9 cm3 refined halite

4. 236. 6 cm3 partially hydrogenated tallow triglyceride

5. 177. 45 cm3 crystalline C12H22O11

6. 177. 45 cm3 unrefined C12H22O11

7. 4. 9 cm3 methyl ether of protocatechuic aldehyde

8. Two calcium carbonate-encapsulated avian albumen-coated protein

9. 473. 2 cm3 theobroma cacao

10. 236. 6 cm3 de-encapsulated legume meats (sieve size #10)

To a 2-L jacketed round reactor vessel (reactor #1) with an overall heat transfer coefficient of about 100 Btu/F-ft2-hr, add ingredients one, two and three with constant agitation.
In a second 2-L reactor vessel with a radial flow impeller operating at 100 rpm, add ingredients four, five, six, and seven until the mixture is homogenous. To reactor #2, add ingredient eight, followed by three equal volumes of the homogenous more...

Little Johnny took his new chemistry set down to the basement where he stayed all afternoon mixing various liquids together. Eventually, his dad went down and found him surrounded by test tubes, pounding something into the wall. "Why are you hammering a nail into the wall?" asked his dad. "It's not a nail," said Johnny. "It's a worm! I tried to bring this worm back to life with my special chemical mixture, but my formula made the worm hard as a rock," he said as he showed his dad the liquid that he had soaked the worm in. "I'll tell you what. You give me the test tube with your special chemical mixture in it and I'll buy you a Toyota." So little Johnny handed the test tube over. The next day, when Johnny got home from school, he saw a brand new Mercedes-Benz parked in the driveway. He asked his dad about the car. "Oh," said the father, "your Toyota is in the garage. The Mercedes is from your mother."

Chocolate Chip Cookies:
Ingredients:
1. 532. 35 cm3 gluten
2. 4. 9 cm3 NaHCO3
3. 4. 9 cm3 refined halite
4. 236. 6 cm3 partially hydrogenated tallow triglyceride
5. 177. 45 cm3 crystalline C12H22O11
6. 177. 45 cm3 unrefined C12H22O11
7. 4. 9 cm3 methyl ether of protocatechuic aldehyde
8. Two calcium carbonate-encapsulated avian albumen-coated protein
9. 473. 2 cm3 theobroma cacao
10. 236. 6 cm3 de-encapsulated legume meats (sieve size #10)
To a 2-L jacketed round reactor vessel (reactor #1) with an overall heat transfer coefficient of about 100 Btu/F-ft2-hr, add ingredients one, two and three with constant agitation. In a second 2-L reactor vessel with a radial flow impeller operating at 100 rpm, add ingredients four, five, six, and seven until the mixture is homogenous. To reactor #2, add ingredient eight, followed by three equal volumes of the homogenous mixture in reactor #1. Additionally, add ingredient nine and ten more...

Line 1. Butter, a minimum of half a pound (8 oz.), but not to exceed 1 (one)
pound. (See line 4.)
Line 2. Sugar, light brown or white, unless you or your spouse
had a financial account in a foreign country in 1990, in which case
dark brown sugar must be used. Do not substitute molasses or honey.
Use 1 (one) cup and adjust to taste.
Line 3. Eggs, six or half a dozen, whichever is greater.
Line 4. Semisweet chocolate, 6 oz. Nonfarm families may choose
the optional method of using cocoa powder. If you elect the Cocoa
Method, add 1/2 oz. (One Tablespoon) of butter to each 3
tablespoons of cocoa. Multiply by .9897 per ounce of substitution.
For adjustments to sugar, see pg. 29. Add total of additional
butter to Line 1 (above). Sugar adjustments should be reflected in
final total of Line 2. For additional details on cocoa conversion,
see Form 551.
Line 5a. Flour, white. If you were a federal, state or local
government employee, more...

Chocolate Chip Cookies:
Ingredients:
1. 532.35 cm3 gluten
2. 4.9 cm3 NaHCO3
3. 4.9 cm3 refined halite
4. 236.6 cm3 partially hydrogenated tallow triglyceride
5. 177.45 cm3 crystalline C12H22O11
6. 177.45 cm3 unrefined C12H22O11
7. 4.9 cm3 methyl ether of protocatechuic aldehyde
8. Two calcium carbonate-encapsulated avian albumen-coated protein
9. 473.2 cm3 theobroma cacao
10. 236.6 cm3 de-encapsulated legume meats (sieve size #10)
To a 2-L jacketed round reactor vessel (reactor #1) with an overall heat transfer coefficient of about 100 Btu/F-ft2-hr, add ingredients one, two and three with constant agitation. In a second 2-L reactor vessel with a radial flow impeller operating at 100 rpm, add ingredients four, five, six, and seven until the mixture is homogenous. To reactor #2, add ingredient eight, followed by three equal volumes of the homogenous mixture in reactor #1. Additionally, add ingredient nine and ten slowly, with constant more...