Matzah Jokes

A blind man was sitting on a park bench. A Rabbi sat down next to him and began chomping on a piece of matzah.Taking pity on the disabled, he broke off a piece and gave it to the blind man.Several minutes later, the blind man tapped the Rabbi on the shoulder and asked, "Who wrote this sh*t?"

Taking a few crumbs to Tashlich from whatever old bread is in the house lacks subtlety, nuance and religious sensitivity. Instead, this coming Rosh Hashanah consider these options:
For ordinary sins, use White Bread
For exotic sins, French Bread
For particularly dark sins, Pumpernickel
For complex sins, Multi-grain
For twisted sins, Pretzels
For tasteless sins, Rice Cakes
For sins of indecision, Waffles
For sins committed in haste, Matzah
For sins committed in less than eighteen minutes, Shmurah Matzah
For sins of chutzpah, Fresh Bread
For substance abuse, Poppy Seed
For committing arson, Toast
For committing auto theft, Caraway
For being ill tempered, Sourdough
For silliness, Nut Bread
For not giving full value, Shortbread
For jingoism, Yankee Doodles
For excessive use of irony, Rye Bread
For telling bad jokes, Corn Bread
For hardening our hearts, Jelly doughnuts
For being money hungry, Enriched Bread more...

New IRS auditor, eager to make a name for himself, decided to review the tax returns of the local synagogue. He assumed they were turning some unreported revenues somewhere, and was determined to find it.
He proceeded to interrogate the Rabbi, asking him what the Synagogue did with the wax drippings from the Shabbat, Havdallah and Chanukah candles.
The Rabbi, pleased to show the auditor that nothing went to waste, responded that the used wax is collected and sent to a candle factory and they send the temple new candles.
"What about the crumbs from the matzah you eat at Passover?" asked the IRS auditor.
"Simple," the Rabbi responded. "We collect all the crumbs, send them to the matzah bakery and they send us matzah meal."
All right, said the auditor, refusing to give up. I know that you're a moyel as well as a Rabbi. What do you do with the leftovers from the circumcisions?"
"That's easy too," said the Rabbi. "We more...

A blind man is sitting on a park bench. A rabbi sits down next to him. The rabbi is chomping on a piece of matzah.
Taking pity on the blind man, he breaks off a piece and gives it to the blind man.
Several minutes later, the blind man turns taps the rabbi on the shoulder and asks, "Who wrote this junk?"