Leroy Jokes / Recent Jokes

Little Leroy came into the kitchen where his mother was making dinner.
His birthday was coming up and he thought this was a good time to tell his mother what he wanted.
"Mom, I want a bike for my birthday."
Little Leroy was a bit of a troublemaker. He had gotten into trouble at school and at home.
Leroy's mother asked him if he thought he deserved to get a bike for his birthday.
Little Leroy, of course, thought he did.
Leroy's mother, being a religious woman, wanted Leroy to reflect on his behavior over the last year.
"Go to your room, Leroy, and think about how you have behaved this year. Then write a letter to God and tell him why you deserve a bike for your birthday."
Little Leroy stomped up the steps to his room and sat down to write God a letter.
Letter #1:
"Dear God,
I have been a very good boy this year and I would like a bike for my birthday. I want a red one.
Your friend, more...

Three ladies all have separate husbands named Leroy. One evening, while sharing a few drinks at the bar, one of the ladies suggests, "Let's name our Leroys after a soda pop, because I'm tired of getting my Leroy mixed up with your Leroy, and her Leroy mixed up with your Leroy." The other two ladies agree. The first lady speaks out, "Okay then, I'm gonna name my Leroy 7-Up because he has 7 inches and it's always up!" The three ladies hoot and holler, and slap each other high fives. Then, the second lady says, "I'm gonna name my Leroy Mountain Dew because he can mount and do me any day of the week." Again, the three ladies hoot and holler, and slap each other more high fives. The third lady then says, "You know, those two Leroys were good, but I'm gonna name my Leroy, Jack Daniels." The other two ladies shout in unison, "Jack Daniels? That's not a soda pop... that's a hard liquor!" The third lady bursts out, "That's my Leroy!"

A woman walks into the downtown welfare office, trailed by 15 kids... "WOW," the social worker exclaims, "Are they ALL YOURS???" "Yep they are all mine," the flustered mumma sighs, having heard that question a thousand times before. She says, "Sit down Leroy. All the children rush to find seats.

"Well," says the social worker, then you must be here to sign up. I'll need all your children's names."

"This one's my oldest - he is Leroy." "OK, and who's this one?" Well, this one he is Leroy, also." The social worker raises an eyebrow but continues. One by one, through the oldest four, all boys, all named Leroy. Then she is introduced to the eldest girl, named Leighroy!

"All right..." says the caseworker, "I'm seeing a pattern here. Are they ALL named Leroy?" Their Momma replied, "Well, yes - it makes it easier. When it is time to get them out of bed and more...

A woman went down to the Welfare Office to get aid. The office worker asked her, "How many children do you have?"
"Ten," she replied.
"What are their names?" he asked.
"LeRoy, LeRoy, LeRoy, LeRoy, LeRoy, LeRoy, LeRoy, LeRoy, LeRoy, and LeRoy," she answered.
"They're all named LeRoy?" he asked "What if you want them to come in from playing outside?"
"Oh, that's easy," she said. "I just call 'LeRoy,' and they all come running in."
"And, if you want them to come to the table for dinner?"
"I just say, 'LeRoy, come eat your dinner'," she answered.
"But what if you just want ONE of them to do something?" he asked.
"Oh, that's easy," she said. "I just use their last name!"

A woman went down to the Welfare Office to get aid. The office worker asked her, "How many children do you have?""Ten," she replied."What are their names?" he asked."LeRoy, LeRoy, LeRoy, LeRoy, LeRoy, LeRoy, LeRoy, LeRoy, LeRoy, and LeRoy," she answered."They're all named LeRoy?" he asked "What if you want them to come in from playing outside?""Oh, that's easy," she said. "I just call 'LeRoy,' and they all come running in.""And, if you want them to come to the table for dinner?""I just say, 'LeRoy, come eat your dinner'," she answered."But what if you just want ONE of them to do something?" he asked."Oh, that's easy," she said. "I just use their last name!"

A woman went down to the Welfare Office to get aid. The office worker asked her, "How many children do you have?" "Ten," she replied." What are their names?" he asked." LeRoy, LeRoy, LeRoy, LeRoy, LeRoy, LeRoy, LeRoy, LeRoy, LeRoy, and LeRoy," she answered." They're all named LeRoy?" he asked "What if you want them to come in from playing outside?" "Oh, that's easy," she said. "I just call' LeRoy,' and they all come running in." "And, if you want them to come to the table for dinner?" "I just say,' LeRoy, come eat your dinner'," she answered." But what if you just want ONE of them to do something?" he asked." Oh, that's easy," she said. "I just use their last name!"

Two boys from the mountains, Leroy and Jasper have been
promoted from privates to sergeants. Not long after,
they're out for a walk and Leroys says, "Hey, Jasper,
there's the NCO Club. Let's you and me stop in."
"But we's privates," protests Jasper. "We's
sergeants now," says Leroy, pulling him inside.
"Now, Jasper, I'm a-gonna sit down and have me
a drink." "But we's privates," says Jasper.
"You blind, boy?" asks Leroy, pointing at
his stripes. "We's sergeants now." So they
have their drink, and pretty soon a hooker comes up
to Leroy. "You're cute," she says, "and
I'd like to date you, but I've got a bad case of gonorrhoea."
Leroy pulls his friend to the side and whispers, "Jasper,
go look in the dictionary and see what gonorrhoea means.
If it's okay, give me the okay sign." So Jasper
goes to look it up, comes back, and more...