Katherine Jokes

  • Funny Jokes

    After 40 years of marriage, Jimmy decides to leave Katherine.
    She starts crying and then asks, "How can you do this, Jimmy? How can you just walk out? The first year we were together, you caught pneumonia and almost died! Who sat by your bed and nursed you back to health? Me!
    And when you lost half your family in the terrible car crash, who kept you going and kept your spirits up? Me!
    And when our kids grew up and ran away from home, who sat with you can comforted you? Me!
    And when you lost everything last year in the fire at the store, who stayed at your side the whole time? Me!
    How could you leave me, Jimmy? You've been through everything with me."
    Jimmy replies, "That's just the problem, Katherine! You're just fucking bad luck!"

    After 40 years of marriage, Jimmy decides to leave Katherine.She starts crying and then asks, "How can you do this, Jimmy? How can you just walk out? The first year we were together, you caught pneumonia and almost died! Who sat by your bed and nursed you back to health? Me! And when you lost half your family in the terrible car crash, who kept you going and kept your spirits up? Me! And when our kids grew up and ran away from home, who sat with you can comforted you? Me! And when you lost everything last year in the fire at the store, who stayed at your side the whole time? Me! How could you leave me, Jimmy? You've been through everything with me."Jimmy replies, "That's just the problem, Katherine! You're just fucking bad luck!"

    Marriage Quotes 3
    A man must marry only a very pretty woman in case he should ever want some other man to take her off his hands. - Sacha Guitry
    When a man steals your wife, there is no better revenge than to let him keep her. - Sacha Guitry
    An ideal wife is one who remains faithful to you but tries to be just as charming as if she weren't. - Sacha Guitry
    The marriage of Marxism and feminism has been like the marriage of husband and wife depicted in English common law: Marxism and feminism are one, and that one is Marxism. - Heidi Hartmann [The Unhappy Marriage of Marxism and Feminism]
    If you want to sacrifice the admiration of many men for the criticism of one, go ahead, get married. - Katherine Hepburn
    Sometimes I wonder if men and women really suit each other. Perhaps they should live next door and just visit now and then. - Katherine Hepburn
    Bigamy is one way of avoiding the painful publicity of divorce and the expense of alimony. - Oliver more...

    Sister Mary Katherine lived in a nunnery, a block away from Jack's liquor store. One day, in walked Sister Mary K. and said, "Oh Jack, give me a pint o'the brandy."
    Sister Mary Katherine," exclaimed Jack, " I could never do that! I have never sold alcohol to a nun in my life!"
    "Oh Jack, she responded, it's only for the Mother Superior." Her voice dropped, "It helps her constipation, you know." So Jack sold her the brandy.
    Later that night Jack closed the store and walked home. As he passed the nunnery, who should he see but Sister Mary Katherine? And she was snookered. She was singing and dancing, whirling around and flapping her arms like a bird, right there on the sidewalk. A crowd was gathering.
    Jack pushed through and exclaimed, "Sister Mary Katherine! For shame! and you told me this was for the Mother Superior's constipation!"
    Sister Mary Katherine didn't miss a beat as she replied, "And so it is, me more...

    Sister Mary Katherine lived in a nunnery, a block away from Jack's liquor store. One day, in walked Sister Mary K. and said, "Oh Jack, give me a pint o'the brandy."Sister Mary Katherine," exclaimed Jack, " I could never do that! I have never sold alcohol to a nun in my life!""Oh Jack, she responded, it's only for the Mother Superior." Her voice dropped, "It helps her constipation, you know." So Jack sold her the brandy.Later that night Jack closed the store and walked home. As he passed the nunnery, who should he see but Sister Mary Katherine? And she was snookered. She was singing and dancing, whirling around and flapping her arms like a bird, right there on the sidewalk. A crowd was gathering.Jack pushed through and exclaimed, "Sister Mary Katherine! For shame! and you told me this was for the Mother Superior's constipation!"Sister Mary Katherine didn't miss a beat as she replied, "And so it is, me lad, so it is...When she more...

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