Jumping Jokes / Recent Jokes

Two guys are bungee jumping one day. The first guy says
> > > to the second "You know, we can make a lot of money
> > > running our own bungee jumping service in Mexico." The
> > > second guy thinks this is a great idea, so the two pool
> > > their money and buy everything they'll need-a tower, an
> > > elastic cord, insurance, etc. So, they travel to Mexico
> > > and begin to set up on the square. As they are
> > > constructing the tower, a crowd begins to assemble.
> > > Slowly, more and more people gather to watch them work.
> > >
> > > The first guy jumps. He bounces at the end of the cord,
> > > but when he comes back up, the second guy notices that
> > > he has a few cuts and scratches. Unfortunately, the
> > > second guy isn't able to catch him, he falls again,
> > > bounces and comes back up again. This time he is
> > > bruised and bleeding. Again, the second guy misses him.
> > > The more...

There's a brunette standing in the middle of a street jumping up and down, counting "57, 57, 57." A blonde walks up to her and decides that this game could be fun. She asks the brunette if she can play too and the brunette says, "Sure." So the two jump up and down counting "57, 57, 57." Suddenly, the brunette jumps onto the curb and the blonde gets hit by a truck. The brunette goes back into the street and starts jumping again, counting "58, 58, 58."

What do you call a bunch of WHITE people jumping out of a plane? -Daytime What do you call a bunch of BLACK people jumping out of a plane? -Night time What do you call a bunch of MEXICANS jumping out of a plane? -Air pollution

My wife who is blonde came running up to me in the driveway the other day, just jumping for joy! I didn't know why she was jumping for joy but I thought, what the heck and I starting jumping up and down along with her.
She said, "Honey, I have some really great news for you!" I said, "Great. Tell me what you're so happy about." She stopped jumping and was breathing heavily from all the jumping up and down, when she told me that she was pregnant! I was ecstatic! We had been trying for a while, so I grabbed her and kissed her on the lips and told her, "That's great! I couldn't be happier!"
Then, she said "Oh, honey, there's more." I asked, "What do you mean 'more'?" She said, "Well, we are not having just one baby. We are going to have TWINS!" Amazed at how she could know so soon after getting pregnant, I asked her how she knew. She said, "Well, that was the easy part. I went to Wal-Mart and bought the twin-pack more...

Calories can be burned by the hundreds by engaging in strenuous activities that do not require physical exercise.Beating around the bush.................75
Jumping to conclusions.................100
Climbing the walls.....................150
Swallowing your pride...................50
Passing the buck........................25
Throwing your weight around (depending on your weight)...50-300
Dragging your heels....................100
Pushing your luck......................250
Making mountains out of molehills......500
Hitting the nail on the head............50
Wading through paperwork...............300
Bending over backwards..................75
Jumping on the bandwagon...............200
Balancing the books.....................25
Running around in circles..............350
Eating crow............................225
Tooting your own horn...................25
Climbing the ladder of more...

A brunette was jumping up and down on a set of railroad tracks saying, "21, 21, 21." A blonde walked by, noticed the brunette, started jumping up and down on the tracks and repeated what the brunette was saying. The brunette heard a train whistle and jumped off of the tracks. The blonde kept jumping and saying, "21, 21, 21." The train ran over the blonde. When the train ended, the brunette jumped back on the tracks and started saying, "22, 22, 22."

My wife, who is blonde, came running up to me in the driveway, the other day, just jumping for joy! I didn’t know why she was jumping for joy but I thought, what the heck and I starting jumping up and down along with her. When she said, “Honey, I have some really great news for you! ”, I said, “Great. Tell me what you’re so happy about. ” She stopped jumping and was breathing heavily from all the jumping up and down, when she told me that she was pregnant! I was ecstatic! We had been trying for a while, so I grabbed her and kissed her on the lips and told her, “That’s great! I couldn’t be happier! ” Then, she said “Oh, honey. There’s more. ” I asked, “What do you mean ‘more’? ” She said, “Well, we are not having just one baby. We are going to have TWINS! ” Amazed at how she could know so soon after getting pregnant, I asked her how she knew. She said, “Well, that was the easy part. I went to Wal-Mart and bought the twin-pack home pregnancy test more...