Janitors Jokes

A South African man has just broken the world record for the longest sustained "hard on". The old record of 17 days was smashed, when the man injected himself with Caverjet, a medication to fight erectile disfunction. The formula didn't mix to well with his bodybuilding steriods, and he wound up in a Johannesburg hospital with a 22 day boner.

A chinese restaurant owner, famous for his snake dishes was killed by two reptiles he had just decapitated. The serpents freshly severed heads were left on the kitchen bench, and as the man went to pick them up, both sank their fangs into his hands, and with their deadly venom, killed him.

3 janitors tried to get rid of a gopher at a school in California by trying to spray it to death with a solvent used to freeze chewing gum, so you can pick it up. The men used several cans to pursue the gopher, but to no avail, until one lit up a cigarette, which then blew the janitors out the room, hospitalised them and 16 more...

Another item taken from K M Reese's article in C&EN.
An anonymous caller who wrote, "I can't stop laughing", sent in a newspaper story about three janitors who in the utility room of a Californian elementary school tried to euthanize a gopher that a student had found on the school grounds and brought to them.
To that end they sprayed the rodent with several cans of a "freezing solvent used to clean gum and wax off floors".
One of the janitors tried to light a cigarette, and the resulting blast blew all three out of the room. All apparently came out OK, as did the 16 pupils who were treated for minor injuries. The gopher was released later in a field.