Hops Jokes / Recent Jokes

(where "pppphhhhhbbbttttt" equals sticking you tongue between your
lips and blowing air. A pseudo Bronx cheer.)
A man walks into a bar with a Leprechaun on his shoulder. He walks
up the the bar and sets on down. He proceeds to order a beer for
himself and for the little Leprechaun.
Well, the guy and the Leprechaun drink about two beers when finally
the Leprechaun jumps down off the guy's shoulder, trots down the bar
and stands in front of a rather large construction worker. He looks
at the construction worker and goes, "ppphhhbbbttttttt" right to the
big guy's face.
Well the Leprechaun trots on back on hops back onto his buddy's shoulder.
The construction worker is a little ticked, but decides to shine on
this breach of manners.
After another beer and a half though, the Leprechaun hops down and
again goes in front of the construction worker and goes, "ppphhhbbbbttt"
to the more...

At the edge of the forest there was a somewhat mediocre wizard. He is there to help the animals of the forest with some of their daily problems. One day a toad hops in.
The toad says "Oh wizard, please help me. I was born with a yellow penis."
"I've told you animals, I can't help you with any big problems," responds the wizard. "You'll have to go see the Wizard of Oz."
So the toad hops off on his merry little way. But in not too long an elephant enters the wizards pad.
"Oh wizard," the elephant begins, "please help me. I was born without a trunk."
Now the wizard is infuriated. "Don't you stupid animals ever listen!!! Take your damn big problems to the wizard of Oz!"
The elephant responds "But, wizard how do I get to the Wizard of Oz?"
"Oh that's easy," says the wizard. "Just follow the yellow dicked toad!"

ONE DAY A BOY WAS TAKING A SHOWER WITH HIS MOTHER AND HE SAYS ''MOMMY WHAT ARE THOSE''? SHE REPLIES..''OH THOSE ARE MY HEAD LIGHTS''THE BOY THEN AGAIN ASKS ''MOMMY WHATS THAT''? SHE THEN REPLIES ''OH THATS MY GARDEN'' THE BOY SAYS THANKS AND HOPS OUT OF THE SHOWER.
THE NEXT DAY THE BOY TAKES A SHOWER WITH HIS DAD.THE BOT THEN ASKS HIS DAD ''DADDY WHATS THAT''? THE FATHER REPLIES ''OH THATS MY SNAKE''THE BOY SAYS THANKS AND HOPS OUT OF THE SHOWER. THAT NIGHT THE BOY HAD A BAD DREAM SO HE WENT INTO HIS PARENTS ROOM SNEAKS UNDER THE SHEETS AND SAYS''MOMMY MOMMY QUICK TURN ON YOUR HEAND LIGHTS THERES A SNAKE IN YOUR GARDEN!!!

At the edge of the forest there was a somewhat mediocre wizard. He is there to help the animals of the forest with some of their daily problems. One day a toad hops in.The toad says "Oh wizard, please help me. I was born with a yellow penis.""I've told you animals, I can't help you with any big problems," responds the wizard. "You'll have to go see the Wizard of Oz."So the toad hops off on his merry little way. But in not too long an elephant enters the wizards pad."Oh wizard," the elephant begins, "please help me. I was born without a trunk."Now the wizard is infuriated. "Don't you stupid animals ever listen!!! Take your damn big problems to the wizard of Oz!"The elephant responds "But, wizard how do I get to the Wizard of Oz?""Oh that's easy," says the wizard. "Just follow the yellow dicked toad!"

What happened when a frog joined the cricket team? He bowled long hops!