Hermaphrodite Jokes

  • Funny Jokes

    My wife has just found out I've been fucking a Hermaphrodite.
    She screamed at me, "What's she got that I haven't got?"

    A woman gives birth to a baby and afterward the doctor comes into the room and says, "I have something to tell you about your child.." The woman slowly sits up with a worried look on her face and says, "What's wrong with it?" The doctor says, "There's nothing really wrong with it, it's just a little different! It's a hermaphrodite." The woman looks confused. "A hermaphrodite, what's that?" The doctor replies, "It has both features of a male and a female." The woman looks relieved. "What? You mean it has a penis AND a brain?"

    A woman gives birth to a baby, and afterwards, the doctor comes in, and he says, "I have to tell you something about your baby."

    The woman sits up in bed and says, "What's wrong with my baby, Doctor? What's wrong???"

    The doctor says, "Well, now, nothing's wrong, exactly, but your baby is a little bit different. Your baby is a hermaphrodite."

    The woman says, "A hermaphrodite... what's that???"

    The doctor says, "Well, it means your baby has the... er... features... of a male and a female."

    The woman turns pale. She says, "Oh my god! You mean it has a penis... AND a brain?"

    The following are questions the answers to I wish I knew:
    If one hermaphrodite dates another hermaphrodite, are they gay, straight or bisexual?
    Why does the cat always use the litter box right before I need to brush my teeth?
    Who is Murphy and what sad life did he lead to have that law named after him?
    Why do they keep making things smaller and smaller when all that does is make them easier to lose?
    Why are there so many 24%s in my joke recomender?
    And why oh why are there so many of these lists?

    I thought I would share a transcript of a particularly productive moment in my 9th grade "English" (sic) class:
    We watched the end of Zeferelli's "Romeo & Juliet" today in class. During the scene in which Romeo discovers Juliet, who appears to be dead, lying in the Capulet family crypt, the following discussion occurred:
    Julio Baez: Yo, he's gonna jump on her!
    Ms. Young: Julio, nowhere on this planet would that be an appropriate thing to say.
    Julio: No, Ms. Young! I think he's a hermaphrodite!
    Ms. Young: Julio, he's not a hermaphrodite.
    Julio: No, Ms. Young! For real! There's really people who like to have sex with dead people!
    Ms. Young: Yes, but they're not called "hermaphrodites," they're called "necrophiliacs."
    Julio: (Aside to Felix) She's so stupid. (To me) No Ms. Young, necrophiliac is when you have that disease where you can't stop bleeding.
    At least they're learning something.

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