Heidi Jokes / Recent Jokes

Knock Knock
Who's there!
Heidi!
Heidi who?
Heidi hi campers! Knock Knock
Who's there!
Heidi!
Heidi who?
Heidi-clare war on you!

Why didn't the polics handcuff Heidi Fleiss when they brought her in?
It would have cost an extra $500

According to the Associated Press, Heidi Klum and Seal are expecting their second child together.
When asked how it feels, an overwhelmed and emotional Heidi Klum said that she "almost cannot grasp hold of it". Asked to elaborate on her feelings of unbelievable joy, the tearful Klum responded, "I meant I still can't believe I'm actually having sex with Seal".

Southern slang, or "Hickphonics", has been approved as a language to be taught in all Southern schools. A speaker of this language would be a Hickophone.
The following are excerpts from the Hickphonics/English Dictionary:
HEIDI - noun. Greeting.
HIRE YEW - Complete sentence. Remainder of greeting.
Usage:- "Heidi, hire yew?"
BARD - verb. Past tense of the infinitive "to borrow."
Usage:- "My brother bard my pickup truck."
JAWJUH - noun. The State north of Florida. Capitol is Lanner.
Usage:- "My brother from Jawjuh bard my pickup truck."
BAMMER - noun. The State west of Jawjuh. Capitol is Berminhayum.
Usage:- "A tornader jes went through Bammer an' left $20,000,000 in improvements."
MUNTS - noun. A calendar division.
Usage:- "My brother from Jawjuh bard my pickup truck, and I ain't herd from him in munts."
THANK - verb. Ability to cognitively process.
Usage:- more...