Havent Jokes

I havent spoken to my wife for 18 months! - I dont like to interrupt her.

Why havent Women landed on the Moon? - Because it doesnt need cleaning yet!

"Wheres your pencil, Bud?" the teacher asked an American boy who had just come to school in Britain. "I aint got one, Sir." "Youre in England. now, Bud. Not aint, havent. I havent got a pencil. You havent got a pencil. They havent got a pencil.""Gee!" said Bud. "Pop said things were tough in this country, but I didnt know pencils were so hard to come by."

Sir you havent touched your custard. Im just waiting for the fly to stop using it as a trampoline!