Gay Jokes

  • Funny Jokes

    In a small town some where in Illinois lies a family. It consisted of a husband, wife, three sons, and a daughter. One of the sons had a terrible secret.

    "Dad, I don't know how to tell you this, but I'm gay," said the son.

    The Dad was furious he couldn't believe that one of his sons was gay.

    A year had passed and his second son approached him and told a very bad secret.

    "Dad, I'm sorry to disappoint you but I'm gay."

    The Dad went crazy again, he couldn't believe that two out of three sons were gays.

    Another year had passed and the third son came forward. "Dad I know you're not going to want to hear this but, I'm gay.

    The Dad was enraged he started shouting "DOESN'T ANYONE IN THIS FAMILY LIKE GIRLS ANYMORE?!!"

    The daughter said, "I do, I do!"

    FROM: Patty Lewis, Human Resources Director
    TO: All Employees
    DATE: October 1, 2009

    RE: Gala Christmas Party

    I'm happy to inform you that the company Christmas Party will take place on December 23rd, starting at noon in the private function room at the Grill House. There will be a cash bar and plenty of drinks! We'll have a small band playing traditional carols... feel free to sing along. And don't be surprised if our CEO shows up dressed as Santa Claus! A Christmas tree will be lit at 1:00 PM. Exchanges of gifts among employees can be done at that time; however, no gift should be over $10.00 to make the giving of gifts easy for everyone's pockets. This gathering is only for employees!

    Our CEO will make a special announcement at that time!

    Merry Christmas to you and your family,

    Patty



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    A man is out walking in the hills when he sees a woman standing on the edge of a cliff.She is very upset and crying loudly.

    What are you doing up here, said the man.

    I’m going to kill myself, replied the woman.

    Well, before you do, what about giving me a blowjob? said the man.

    The woman proceeds to give him the best blowjob he can remember.

    Anyway, why do you want to kill yourself? asks the man.

    Because my family have disowned me for dressing up as a woman.’

    A gay guy walks into a bar and says "bartender give me a brewskie."

    The bartender says, "We don't serve your kind here."

    The gay continues, "I'll just sit in the corner and drink my beer and won't say anything."

    The bartender says, "Well, all right!" and pours a beer.

    A while later a cowboy walks in and says "Bartender give me a beer! I'm so thirsty I could lick the sweat off a cow's balls"

    A voice is heard from the corner. "Moo! Moo! Buckaroo!"

    1. Homosexuality is not natural, much like eyeglasses, polyester, and birth control are not natural.

    2. Heterosexual marriages are valid because they produce children. Infertile couples and old people cannot get legally married because the world needs more children.

    3. Obviously gay parents will raise gay children because straight parents only raise straight children.

    4. Straight marriage will be less meaningful, since Britney Spears's 55-hour just-for-fun marriage was meaningful.

    5. Heterosexual marriage has been around for a long time, and it hasn't changed at all: women are property, Blacks can't marry Whites, and divorce is illegal.

    6. Gay marriage should be decided by the people, not the courts, because the majority-elected legislatures, not courts, have historically protected the rights of minorities.

    7. Gay marriage is not supported by religion. In a theocracy like ours, the values of one religion are always more...

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