Entering Jokes / Recent Jokes

3 girls died and were brought to the gates of heaven. Upon entering the gate, they were halted by St. Peter and his obedient angel.
St. Peter asked the girls, "Before entering you must answer this simple question."
"Which is...?", they replied in unison. "Have you been a good girl ?", he asked the first girl. "Oh yes", she said. "I was a virgin before I got married and was still virgin even after I got married."
"Very good", said St. Peter. "Angel, give this girl... the golden key."
"Have you been a good girl?", he asked the second girl. "Oh, quite good", she said. "I was a virgin before I got married but was not after I got married." "Very good", said St. Peter. "Angel, give this girl... the silver key."
"Have you been a good girl?", he asked the third girl. "Oh no, not at all", she said. "I practically have sex with more...

I keep hearing Bush say "Iraq's entering a new phase." A new phase? What the hell does that even mean? "Don't worry, Iraq. You're entering a new phase. All that blood just means you're finally becoming a woman."

Three girls died and were brought to the gates ofheaven. Upon entering the gate, they were haltedby St. Peter and his obedient angel. St. Peter asked the girls, "Before entering youmust answer this simple question." "Which is. ..?", they replied in unison. "Have you been a good girl?", he asked the first girl."Oh yes", she said. "I was a virgin before I gotmarried and was still virgin even after I got married.""Very good", said St. Peter. "Angel, give this girl. .. the golden key.""Have you been a good girl?", he asked the second girl."Oh, quite good", she said. "I was a virgin before Igot married but was not after I got married." "Very good", said St. Peter. "Angel, give this girl. .. the silver key.""Have you been a good girl?", he asked the third girl."Oh no, not at all," she said. "I practically had sex withevery guy I met before and more...

A teacher observed a boy entering the classroom with dirty hands. She stopped him and said, "Johnny, please wash your hands. My goodness, what would you say if I came into the room with hands like that?"
With a smile the boy replied, "I think I'd be too polite to mention it."

Three girls died and were brought to the gates ofheaven. Upon entering the gate, they were haltedby St. Peter and his obedient angel.St. Peter asked the girls, "Before entering youmust answer this simple question." "Which is...?", they replied in unison. "Have you been a good girl?", he asked the first girl."Oh yes", she said. "I was a virgin before I gotmarried and was still virgin even after I got married.""Very good", said St. Peter. "Angel, give this girl...the golden key.""Have you been a good girl?", he asked the second girl."Oh, quite good", she said. "I was a virgin before Igot married but was not after I got married." "Very good", said St. Peter. "Angel, give this girl... the silver key.""Have you been a good girl?", he asked the third girl."Oh no, not at all," she said. "I practically had sex withevery guy I met before and after I more...