Clark Jokes

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    According to the FBI, most modern-day bank robberies are "unsophisticated and unprofessional crimes," committed by young male repeat offenders who apparently don't know the first thing about their business. This information was included in an interesting, amusing article titles "How Not to Rob a Bank," by Tim Clark, which appeared in the 1987 edition of The Old Farmers Almanac.
    Clark reported that in spite of the widespread use of surveillance cameras, 76 percent of bank robbers use no disguise, 86 percent never study the bank before robbing it, and 95 percent make no long-range plans for concealing the loot. Thus, he offered this advice to would-be bank robbers, along with examples of what can happen if the rules aren't followed:
    Pick the right bank. Clark advises that you don't follow the lead of the fellow in Anaheim, Cal., who tried to hold up a bank that was no longer in business and had no money. On the other hand, you don't want to be too familiar more...

    Knock Knock Who's there! Clark! Clark who? Clark your car in the garage!

    Knock Knock
    Who's there!
    Clark!
    Clark who?
    Clark your car in the garage!

    Three men were on top of the empire state building. The first man's name was Clark the second man's name was Joey and the thirds name was Jo Momma. Joey was drunk so Clark decided to play a little joke on him. Clark said,"
    Yo Joey if u jumped of this building tbe air would bring u rite back up!"
    So Joey said,"
    Oh come on Clark that's not true!"
    So Clark jumped off and came rite back up. "
    Wow!"
    said Joey here le me try! So Joey jumped off and fell flat... dead. Then, Jo Momma said to Clark o jez supaman u gotts to stop doin dat!

    I saw the new Superman movie over the weekend and my first and overwhelming reaction:
    Boy, are the people in Metroplis stupid! And if I ever commit a crime, I want those gullible morons in my jury.
    (I won't reveal any major plot points, except for the whole "Superman was away" thing which is kinda implied by the Superman returns title anyway) So, naturally, Clark Kent was away for five years, too.
    So as soon as Clark Kent comes back into town, Superman starts saving people?
    Coincidence? You'd think not, but apparently these Metropolian morons can't put two and two together even when you're prompting them with "ffffoooouuuu..."
    What's even more annoying is they actually include a scene where a couple of them are close to figuring it out, and then Clark looks over and gives them a goofy smile and akward wave, and they're like, "Ha! We were really on the wrong track with THAT one!"

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