Bike Jokes / Recent Jokes

It was Paddy and Seamus giving the motorcycle a ride on a brisk autumn day. After a wee bit, Paddy who was sitt'n behind Seamus on the bike began to holler. .."Seamus. .. Seamus. .. the wind is cutt'n me chest out!" "Well, Paddy my lad," said Seamus, "why don't you take your jacket off and turn it from front to back. .. that'll block the wind for you." So Paddy took Seamus' advice and turned his jacket from front to back and got back on the bike and the two of them were off down the road again. After a bit, Seamus turned to talk to Paddy and was horrified to see that Paddy was not there. Seamus immediately turned the bike around and retraced their route. When after a short time he came to a turn and saw a bunch of farmers standing around Paddy who was sitting on the ground. "T'anks be to heaven, is he alright?" Seamus hailed to the farmers. "Well," said one of the farmers, " he was alright when we found him here. . but since we more...

An engineering student is walking on campus one day, when another engineer student rides up on a shiny new motorcycle.

"Where did you get such a functional bike?" asked the first.

The second engineer replied: "Well, I was walking along yesterday minding my own business when a beautiful woman rode up on this bike. She threw the bike to the ground, took off all her clothes, spread her arms wide and said: "Take what you want."

The second engineer nodded approvingly: "Good choice; the clothes probably wouldn't have fit."

An Aussie student was walking on campus one day when another Aussie rode up on a shiny new bicycle.
'Where did you get such a nice bike?' asked the first.
The second Aussie replied,
'Well, yesterday I was walking along minding my own business when a beautiful woman rode up on this bike. She threw the bike to the ground, took off all her clothes and said,
"Take what you want."'
The first Aussie nodded approvingly.
'Good choice, the clothes probably wouldn't have fitted.'

To combat the heat in the 1950 Tour de France, ABD-EL KADER Zaag drank a bottle of wine and promptly fell off his bike. After sleeping it off by the roadside, he climbed back in the saddle and sped off... in the wrong direction.

In May, 1986, 52-year-old PEDRO GATICA cycled from his home in Argentina to Mexico for the soccer World Cup, only to find on arrival that he couldn't afford to get in. While he haggled for a ticket, thieves stole his bike.

Cuban postman FELIZ CARVAJAL was denied a medal in the 1904 Olympic marathon when he stopped en route to talk to spec- tators and eat unripe fruit. The resulting indigestion relegated him to fourth place.

Batting at Kalgoorlie, Australia, in the 1970s cricketer STAN DAWSON was hit by a delivery which ignited a box of matches in his pocket. As he tried to beat down the flames, he was run out.

Preparing for a bout at the 1992 New York Golden Gloves Championships, boxer DANIEL CARUSO psyched himself more...

A father came home from a long business trip to find
his son riding a new 21 speed mountain bike.
"Where did you get the money for the bike?
It must have cost $300," he asked.
"Easy, Dad," little Johnny replied.
"I earned it hiking."
"Come on Johnny," the father said.
"Tell me the truth."
"That is the truth!" Johnny replied.
"Every night you were gone, Mom`s boss, Mr. Reynolds,
would come over to see Mom. He`d give me a $20 bill
and tell me to take a hike!"

On Christmas morning a cop on horseback is sitting at a traffic light, and next to him is a kid on his shiny new bike. The cop says to the kid, "Nice bike you got there. Did Santa bring that to you?" The kid says, "Yeah." The cop says, "Well, next year tell Santa to put a tail-light on that bike." The cop then proceeds to issue the kid a $20. 00 bicycle safety violation ticket. The kid takes the ticket and before he rides off says, "By the way, that's a nice horse you got there. Did Santa bring that to you?" Humoring the kid, the cop says, "Yeah, he sure did." The kid says, "Well, next year tell Santa to put the dick underneath the horse, instead of on top."

what is difference between a girl and bike?
the bike is first kicked and then ridden wereas the girl is first ridden and then kicked.