Arthur Jokes / Recent Jokes
Arthur Davidson, of the Harley Davidson Motorcycle Corporation, dies and goes to heaven. At the gates, an angel tells Davidson, "Well, you've been such a good guy and your motorcycles have changed the world. As a reward, you can hang out with anyone you want to in Heaven." Davidson thinks about it and says, "I wanna hang out with God, Himself." The befeathered fellow at the Gates takes Arthur to the Throne Room and introduces him to God. Arthur then asks God, "Hey, aren't you the inventor of Woman?" God says, "Ah, yes." "Well," says Davidson, "You have some major design flaws in your invention: 1. There's too much front end protrusion. 2. It chatters at high speeds. 3. The rear end wobbles too much, and4. The intake is placed too close to the exhaust." "Hmmm..." replies God, "hold on." God goes to the Celestial Super computer, types in a few keystrokes, and waits for the result. The computer prints out a more...
Knock Knock
Who's there?
Arthur!
Arthur who!
Arthur any more biscuits in the tin!
Down at the office Bostwick boasted to one of his buddies, "My son Arthur is smarter even than Abraham Lincoln. Arthur could recite the Gettysburg Address when he was ten years old. Lincoln didn't say it till he was fifty!"
Knock KnockWhos there! Arthur! Arthur who! Arthene you in the butchers, havent I?
Knock Knock Who's there! Arthur! Arthur who! Arthene you in the butchers, haven't I?
Arthur sat brooding at his favorite bar. "Charley," he said to the bartender, "I'm a rat. I've a lovely wife at home and instead of appreciating her, I've been out getting into trouble with another woman.
But a guy can reform. I'm going home right now, Charley, and I'm going to tell her everything, beg her to forgive me and start anew as a model husband."
Thereupon, Arthur paid his tab, went home, told his wife everything and begged her to forgive him so he could start anew as a model husband.
"I'll forgive you on one condition, Arthur," his wife said. "I want to know the name of the woman." But Arthur was too gallant to tell.
"Was it Susan Adams?" she asked.
"I can't tell you, dear," he said.
"I'll bet it was Mrs. Simpson," the wife declared.
"My lips are sealed," said hubby.
"I know," exclaimed the wife, "it's that hussy Mrs. more...
Arthur Davidson of the Harley Davidson Motorcycle Corporation, dies and goes to heaven. At the gates, an angle tells Davidson, "Well, you've
been such a good guy and your motorcycles have changed the world. As a reward, you can hang out with anyone you want to in Heaven."
Davidson thinks about it and says, "I wanna hang out with God, Himself".
The befeathered fellow at the Gates takes Arthur to the Throne Room and introduces him to God.
Arthur then asks God, "Hey, aren't you the inventor of Woman?"
God says " Ah, yes."
"Well," says Davidson, "You have some major flaws in your invention.
Number 1 is there's too much front end protrusion, secondly, it chatters at high speeds, number 3 the rear end wobbles too much, and fourth the intake is placed too close to the exhaust."
"Hmmmmm...." replies God, "hold on." God goes to the Celestial Super computer, types in a few keystrokes, more...