Antidote Jokes

  • Funny Jokes

    Once upon a time, and far, far away lived a beautiful Queen with voluptuous breasts.

    Nick the Dragon slayer knew that the penalty for his desire would be death should he try to touch them.

    One day Nick revealed his secret desire to his colleague, Horatio the Physician, who was the King's chief doctor.

    Horatio the Physician, exclaimed that he could arrange for Nick the Dragon Slayer to satisfy his desire, but it would cost him 1, 000 gold coins to arrange it.

    Without pause, Nick the Dragon Slayer readily agreed to the scheme. The next day, Horatio the Physician made a batch of itching powder and poured a little bit into the Queen's brassiere while she bathed. Soon after she dressed, the itching commenced and grew intense.

    Upon being summoned to the Royal Chambers to address this incident, Horatio the Physician informed the King and Queen that only a special saliva, if applied for four hours, would cure this type of itch, and that more...

    There is a dangerous virus being passed electronically, orally and by hand.This virus is called Worm-Overload-Recreational-Killer (WORK). If you receive WORK from any of your colleagues, your boss or anyone else via any means DO NOT TOUCH IT.

    This virus will wipe out your private life completely. If you should come into contact with WORK put your jacket on and take two good friends to the nearest pub. Purchase the antidote known as Work-Isolator-Neutralizer-Extractor (WINE). Alternate products include Bridge-Environoment-Eradication-Resolution (BEER) and Benign-Orderly-Overload-System-Enhancer (BOOSE). Administer the antidote repeatedly until WORK has been completely eliminated from your system.

    You should forward this warning to 5 friends. If you do not have 5 friends, you have already been infected and WORK is controlling your life.

    Update: After extensive testing it has been concluded that Best-Equivalent-Extractor-Remedy (BEER) may be substituted more...

    Name: "Expecteria Trouserius" (Trouser Snake)
    Location: Throughout the world
    Description: One-eyed, with mushroom-shaped head (other types come with extra
    layers of skin). Varying from pink to black. Fang-less with a highly venomous
    spit. (Spit can reach distances up to 2-3 feet) Size varies from 3 to 12
    inches, depending on its mood & subspecies.
    Symptoms: This snake attacks mainly women in the lower front abdomen,
    resulting in an inconspicuous bump. Then a severe swelling followed by
    excruciating pain after nine months. The attack is not usually fatal. Beware:
    It has been known to attack men in the rear lower abdomen!
    Habitat: Usually found in bedrooms, but has been known to appear in the most
    unusual places.
    Antidote: Various types of vaccine available for women. However, once the
    venom is injected into the body only drastic measures will ensure complete
    recovery. There is no known antidote for men.
    What To Do more...

    NAME: Trouser Snake (Expetirious Trouseris)

    LOCATION; Throughout the world.

    DESCRIPTION:

    One eyed with mushroom-shaped head (others types may come with extra layers of skin)

    *Varying from pink to black.

    *Fang-less with a highly venomous spit (Spit can reach distances up to 2-3 feet).

    *Size varies from 3 to 12 inches, depending on its mood & sub-species.

    SYMPTOMS; This snake attacks mainly women in the lower front abdomen, resulting in an inconspicuous bump. Then a severe swelling followed by excruciating pain after nine months. The attack is not usually fatal.

    *WARNING* BEWARE: It has been know to attack men in the lower abdomen!!!!!!!

    HABITAT: Usually found in bedrooms. Likes dark damp caves. but has been known to appear in the most unusual places.

    ANTIDOTE: Various types of vaccines are available for women. However once the venom is injected into the body only drastic more...

    An antidote is a medicine you take to prevent dotes.

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