"Wordperfect Customer Support" joke
Actual dialogue of a former Wordperfect Customer Support Employee (CSE)Customer Support Employee (CSE): May I help you? Customer: Yes, well, I'm having trouble with WordPerfect.CSE: What sort of trouble?Customer: Well, I was just typing along, and all of a sudden the words went away.CSE: Hmm. So what does your screen look like now?Customer: Nothing.CSE: Are you still in WordPerfect, or did you get out?Customer: How do I tell?CSE: Can you see the C: prompt on the screen?Customer: What's a sea-prompt?CSE: Never mind. Can you move the cursor around on the screen?Customer: There isn't any cursor: I told you, it won't accept anything I type.CSE: Does your monitor have a power indicator?Customer: What's a monitor?CSE: It's the thing with the screen on it that looks like a TV. Does it have a little light that tells you when it's on?Customer: I don't know.CSE: Well, then look on the back of the monitor and find where the power cord goes into it. Can you see that?Customer: Yes, I think so.CSE: Great! Follow the cord to the plug, and tell me if it's plugged into the wall.Customer: I can't. It's dark out here.CSE: Dark? Customer: There's a power outage.CSE: A power... A power outage? Aha! Okay, we've got it licked now. Do you still have the boxes and manuals and packing stuff your computer came in with?Customer: Well, yes, I keep them in the closet.CSE: Good! Go get them, and unplug your system and pack it up just like it was when you got it. Then take it back to the store you bought it from.Customer: Really? Is it that bad?CSE: Yes, I'm afraid it is.
Customer: Well, all right then, I suppose. What do I tell them?CSE: Tell them you're too stupid to own a computer.
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