"The Heretic" joke
Walking across a bridge one day, one man saw another man standing on the edge, about to jump off. So the first man ran over and said, "Stop! Don't do it!" "Why shouldn't I?" the second man said. The first man said, "Well, there's so much to live for!" "Like what?" the suicidal man said said. "Well, are you religious or atheist?" "Religious." "Me too! Are your Christian or Buddhist?" "Christian." "Me too! Are you Catholic or Protestant?" "Protestant." "Me too! Are your Episcopalian or Baptist?" "Baptist!" "Wow! Me too! Are your Baptist Church of God or Baptist Church of the Lord? "Baptist Church of God!" "Me too! Are your Original Baptist Church of God or are you Reformed Baptist Church of God?" "Reformed Baptist Church of God!" "Me too! Are you Reformed Baptist Church of God, Reformation of 1879, or Reformed Baptist Church of God, Reformation of 1915?" "Reformed Baptist Church of God, Reformation of 1915!" The first man said "Die, heretic scum!" and pushed him off.
A dumb blonde was really tired of being made fun of, so she decided to have her hair she would look like a brunette. When she had brown hair, she decided to take a drive in the country.
After she had been driving for a while, she saw a farmer and a flock of sheep and more...
Two cats: Felix & Un-deux-trois, decided to have a race to see who could swim across the river first.Guess who won? Felix! Because Un-deux-trois cat sank.
(Un deux trois quatre cinq)
A lawyer and a blonde are sitting next to each other on a long flight from LA to NY. The lawyer leans over to her and asks if she would like to play a fun game. The blonde just wants to take a nap, so she politely declines and rolls over to the window to catch a few more...
An American businessman was at the pier of a small coastal Mexican village when a small boat with just one fisherman docked. Inside the small boat were several large yellow fin tuna.
The American complimented the Mexican on the quality of his fish and asked how long it took more...
While walking down the street one day, a Republican head of state is tragically hit by a truck and dies. His soul arrives in heaven and is met by St. Peter at the entrance.
"Welcome to Heaven," says St. Peter. "Before you settle in, it seems there is a more...