"The Heretic" joke
Walking across a bridge one day, one man saw another man standing on the edge, about to jump off. So the first man ran over and said, "Stop! Don't do it!" "Why shouldn't I?" the second man said. The first man said, "Well, there's so much to live for!" "Like what?" the suicidal man said said. "Well, are you religious or atheist?" "Religious." "Me too! Are your Christian or Buddhist?" "Christian." "Me too! Are you Catholic or Protestant?" "Protestant." "Me too! Are your Episcopalian or Baptist?" "Baptist!" "Wow! Me too! Are your Baptist Church of God or Baptist Church of the Lord? "Baptist Church of God!" "Me too! Are your Original Baptist Church of God or are you Reformed Baptist Church of God?" "Reformed Baptist Church of God!" "Me too! Are you Reformed Baptist Church of God, Reformation of 1879, or Reformed Baptist Church of God, Reformation of 1915?" "Reformed Baptist Church of God, Reformation of 1915!" The first man said "Die, heretic scum!" and pushed him off.
In a crowded city at a crowded bus stop, a beautiful blonde was waiting for the bus. She was decked out in a tight leather mini skirt with matching tight leather boots and jacket. As the bus rolled up and it became her turn to get on, she became aware that her skirt was too more...
The three words most hated by men during sex:' 'Are you done?'' The three words women hate to hear when having sex...''Honey, I'm home!''
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Q: What's the difference between a girlfriend and a wife?
A: 45 lbs.
Q: What's the difference between a boyfriend more...
Two newfies walked into a pet store. The first says "I want four budgies." Salesman-certainly sir, would you like two male and two female or all male or all female? Newfie-I don't care. I just want 4 budgies! Salesman-certainly sir, what color would you like? We have more...
Person 1: Knock, Knock
Person 2: Who's there?
Person 1: Cows go.
Person 2: Cows go who?
Person 1: No, silly! Cows go moo!