"The 70-year-old man sat down in the orthopedic..." joke

The 70-year-old man sat down in the orthopedic surgeon's office. "You know, Doc," he said, "I've made love in more exotic cars than anyone I know. Must be at least a thousand." "And now, I suppose, you want me to treat you for the arthritis you got from scrunching up in all those uncomfortable positions," the medic said." Hell, no," the old fellow replied. "I want to borrow your Lamborghini."

Freedom is not the right to do as you please, but the liberty to do as you ought.

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A dumb blonde was really tired of being made fun of, so she decided to have her hair she would look like a brunette. When she had brown hair, she decided to take a drive in the country.
After she had been driving for a while, she saw a farmer and a flock of sheep and more...

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Your Moma is so poor when I saw her wobbling down the strret with one shoe, I hollered-"lost a shoe", and she said-"Nope... just found one..."

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Your momas so fat she left the house on high heels and came back on flip flops

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your mumma is so fat when she stands on the scales the scales say TO BE CONTINUED
your momma is so dumb when she gets locked in the supermarket she dies of starvation

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