"Self-Serving" joke
A Chinese Christian just died and went up to the Heaven. After an angel greeted him, the angel said, "Let me take you down to the Hell before we go inside the Heaven."
Once they were there, the Chinese saw a huge table full of a big feast. However, everybody around the table looked real sad and starving. He asked the angel why.
The angel said, "They only get a pair of 4-foot chopsticks and thus each one of them cannot feed oneself because the chopsticks are too long."
Then, they went back to the Heaven and went inside. Again, the Chinese saw a huge table full of a big feast just like that in the Hell and each person has a pair of 4-foot chopsticks too. However, strangely, everybody around the table looked happy and satisfied.
The angel explained, "Simple, here in Heaven each one feeds another with the chopsticks, unlike those selfish ones down there."
A dumb blonde was really tired of being made fun of, so she decided to have her hair she would look like a brunette. When she had brown hair, she decided to take a drive in the country.
After she had been driving for a while, she saw a farmer and a flock of sheep and more...
Two cats: Felix & Un-deux-trois, decided to have a race to see who could swim across the river first.Guess who won? Felix! Because Un-deux-trois cat sank.
(Un deux trois quatre cinq)
A lawyer and a blonde are sitting next to each other on a long flight from LA to NY. The lawyer leans over to her and asks if she would like to play a fun game. The blonde just wants to take a nap, so she politely declines and rolls over to the window to catch a few more...
An American businessman was at the pier of a small coastal Mexican village when a small boat with just one fisherman docked. Inside the small boat were several large yellow fin tuna.
The American complimented the Mexican on the quality of his fish and asked how long it took more...
While walking down the street one day, a Republican head of state is tragically hit by a truck and dies. His soul arrives in heaven and is met by St. Peter at the entrance.
"Welcome to Heaven," says St. Peter. "Before you settle in, it seems there is a more...