"Reaching The Dearly Departed" joke
A young woman, hoping to contact her dearly departed mother, pays a visit to the local psychic. The psychic's eyelids begin to flutter, her voice begins warbling, her hands float up above the table, and she begins moaning. Suddenly, a coherent voice emanates, saying, "Daughter? Are you there?"
"Mother? Is that you?" the wide-eyed, young woman asks.
"Yes, dear daughter, it's me," the voice answers.
"It's really, really you, Mother?" the woman asks again.
"Yes, daughter, it's really, really me," replies the voice.
"Are you sure it's you, Mother?" inquires the puzzled woman.
"Yes, dear, I'm sure it's me," says the voice.
The woman pauses for a moment, then says, "Mother, I have just one question for you."
"Anything, my dearest child," the voice replies.
"Mother, when did you learn to speak English?!?"
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