"One day a little boy over heard his parents..." joke
One day a little boy over heard his parents in the bedrooom arguing,"You bitch, your cunt is too hairy! Whell your dick is to small bastard!"The boy was curious about these new words so he went in the room and asked what they meant. The startled parents did their best to get out of the situation, "You see son, bitch and bastard are what adults call each other sometimes and dick and cunt is a nickname we gave our coats." The boyshrugged his shoulders and went off to play. Later that day the boy was watching his dad shave. Suddenly his dad blurted out, "Shit" when he cuthimself. The boy asked, "dad what does that mean?" and his dad cleverly replied, "That's the brand of shaving cream I'm using." So the boy wandered into the kitchen where his mom was preparing a turkey for company that evening. As he was watching, his mom burned herself on the stove and blurted out "Fuck". Again the boy asked the meaning and the frustrated mother snapped at him, "It's french for cooking now go awnser the door! Thecompany is already here!" So the boy went, oopened the door, and put his new vocabulary to use, "Hello bitches and bastards, you can hang your cuntsand dicks in the closet. My dad is still in the bathroom putting shit on his face and my mom is in the kitchen fucking the turkey."
A cop pulled a guy over for speeding at which time the following conversation was exchanged:
Cop: May I see your driver's license?
Driver: Sorry, I don't have one. It was suspended when I got my 5th DUI.
Cop: May I see the owner's card for the more...
I was in the restaurant yesterday when I suddenly realized I desperately
needed to pass gas. The music was really, really loud, so I timed my
gas with the beat of the music.
After a couple of songs, I started to feel better. I finished my coffee,
and more...
This is about a guy who revealed himself as the biggest stupidass on a major international game site. His nickname was PolleZZ. At some point some other players took the nickname Webmaster and sent him a message, saying that there was a system update going on and that in order more...
Person 1: Knock, Knock
Person 2: Who's there?
Person 1: Cows go.
Person 2: Cows go who?
Person 1: No, silly! Cows go moo!
There were 10 blondes and 1 brunette hanging on a rope in the mountains. the rope was very weak and the brunette said someone had to let go. no one volunteered, until the brunette finally said she would let go, and gave a heart-felt speech. hearing this the blondes started more...