"Merger Mania" joke

Mergers that may or may not make the world a funnier place:

There was a rumor that W. R. Grace Co. was going to buy the Fuller Brush Co. and Mary Kay Cosmetics and then merge with the Hale Business Systems. This would result in the new mega-corporate entity known as:' Hale Mary Fuller Grace.'

Don't forget the failed merger between Yahoo and Netscape....Net'n'yahoo.... (say it out loud) A great number of years ago there was a proposed merger between Fairchild Electronics and Honeywell Computers. Rumor had it that the new company would be called. ... Fairwell Honeychild.

It was announced that Wurlitzer is merging with Xerox. They are going to market. .. reproductive organs.

There is a merger in the works involving Polygram Records, Warner Brothers, and Keebler. It will be called. .. Poly-Warner-Cracker.

Other Merger's we'd like to see:

3M & Goodyear.......................... mmmGood
John Deere & Abitibi-Price............. Deere Abi
Playboy & Toys R Us.................... Boy Toy
Crabtree & Evelyn and Apple Computer... Crab Apple
Zippo Manufacturing + Audi & Dofasco + Dakota Mining...... Zip Audi Do Da
Swissair & Cheseborough-Ponds.......... Swisschese
Honeywell & Imasco & Home Oil.......... Honey, I'm Home
Denison Mines & Alliance & Metal Mining=Mine, All Mine
3M & JC Penny & Canadian Opera Company. Penny Opera
Mattel & Pacific Gold.................. Ma & Pa
Sears Roebuck & Rogers Cable........... Buck Rogers
Cracker Jacks + Maxwell House.......... Crackhouse
Luvs Diapers + Hertz Rent-a-car........ Luv Hertz
Grey Poupon + Dockers Pants............ Grey Poupon Pants
Buttmaster + Sunkist................... Buttkissed
Knott's Berry Farm + National Organization of Women...... Knott NOW

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