"MEDICAL SECRETARY" joke
The following quotes were taken from actual medical records as dictated by physicians.
*By the time he was admitted, his rapid heart had stopped, and he was feeling better.
*Patient has chest pain if she lies on her left side for over a year.
*On the second day the knee was better and on the third day it had completely disappeared.
*The patient has no past history of suicides.
*The patient expired on the floor uneventfully.
*Patient has left his white blood cells at another hospital.
*The patient's past medical history has been remarkably insignificant, with only a forty-pound weight gain in the past three days.
*The patient was in his usual state of good health until his airplane ran out of gas and crashed.
*When she fainted, her eyes rolled around the room.
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