"Joe, Fred And Erap In Brunei" joke

Erap, Joe De V and Fred Lim are soliciting campaign funds from the Sultan of Brunei. The Sultan has a very intelligent horse, who understands English but is lame. Sultan says he will donate a million dollars to the candidate who can make the horse laugh, cry and run. Joe says, "Me first." (as he is wont to do). He puts his face in front of the horse, and starts wiggling his huge ears. The horse enjoys the breeze, but does not laugh. Joe takes out money and waives it in front of the horse while making sad, crying sounds. The horse ignores the money, and refuses to cry. Joe then slaps the horse's behind, and starts shouting "Heyaah". The horse ignores him and refuses to run. (The fact that the horse speaks English was totally lost on Joe, who is not very bright). Lim comes up next. He looks at the horse and says, "Kapag' di ka tumawa, papatayin kita". Horse no laugh. He walks over to the other side and says, "Kapag' di ka umiyak, papa-salvage kita". Horse no cry. Finally, he stands beside the horse and says, "Kung hindi ka tumakbo, pipinturahan ko yung bahay mo ng "AKO'Y PILAY". Horse no run. Erap comes to the front. He whispers something in the horse's ear. The horse bucks and laughs so loudly, the Sultan thought it was going to die. Erap whispers again. The horse starts to weep copiously. Finally, Erap whispers again, and the horse takes off running like a shot. Joe and Fred are amazed. "What did you say to the horse first?" asks Joe. Erap: I told him "I'm the Vice-President of the Philippines". "And how did you make him cry?" asks Fred. Erap: I told him "And I'm going to be the next President of the Philippines". "Why did he run away?" they both asked. Erap: "I told him if he didn't start running now, I was going to bring him back to the Philippines, and make him a registered Filipino voter.

Maori falla " Me miss!?"
English Teacher, "You! yes you?" "How many seconds are there in one minute?" Whole class puts their hands up. Miss! Miss! I know!
Maori falla " rrrrrrrr ummmmmmm rrr "60 Miss! 60 seconds in one minute more...


China, New Zealand, New England, and Samoa were all building a big Tower for their leaders. So after they were done building the tower each leader wanted to make a toast. China went first. He steps up and says, "I want to make a toast to the Great Wall of China!" All more...


There was an ambulance with its siren on that was rushing to the hospital that passed by a tenement. After they passed the tenement, they saw a Samoan man running quickly to the ambulance. The drivers were questioned by his presence behind them so they stopped the ambulance and more...


The kindergarten class had to come up with a sentence using the colors green, pink, and yellow. So the teacher calls up every single kid in the classroom. But she forgot to call on the Samoan kid. So she asks him to please step up to the front of the class and recite his more...


Q: why did the Maori cross the road on a motorbike?
A: to get to the other side.
Q: why did the pakeha cross the road?
A: to get his motorbike back!

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