"If at first you don't" joke

If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you.
The pen is mightier than the sword - if the sword is very small and the pen is real sharp.
If you throw a cat out a car window, does it become kitty litter?
Call me insane one more time and I'll eat your other eye!
I didn't fight my way to the top of the food chain to be a vegetarian.

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