"Helicopter Grenade" joke

There are three guys in a helicopter and they each get to choose what they want to throw out.
The first guys chooses an apple. So he takes an apple and throws it out.
The second guy chooses a brick. So he takes a brick and throws it out.
The third guy chooses a grenade. So he pulls the pin and throws it out.
They land a while later and are walking along when they find a man rubbing his head.
They ask, "
What happened to you?"
He answers, "
An apple hit me on the head."
They're walking along again and find a man lying unconcious on the ground.
They ask the cop, "
What happened to him?"
He answers, "
A brick hit him on the head."
They're walking again, when they find a man laughing histerically.
They ask, "
What happened to you?"
He answers, "
I farted and the house blew up behind me!"

Two hydrogen atoms walk into a bar. One says, 'I think I've lost an electron.'
The other says 'Are you sure?'
The first says, 'Yes, I'm positive.'

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Why is santa claus always so happy?
He knows where all of the bad girls live!

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A lawyer and a blonde are sitting next to each other on a long flight from LA to NY. The lawyer leans over to her and asks if she would like to play a fun game. The blonde just wants to take a nap, so she politely declines and rolls over to the window to catch a few more...

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An old married couple were driving down the road one day when suddenly the woman punched her husband right in the face. He shouted, "what the hell was that for?". She replied, "That was for 50 years of the worst sex I ever had!" As they continued down the more...

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Person 1: Knock, Knock
Person 2: Who's there?
Person 1: Cows go.
Person 2: Cows go who?
Person 1: No, silly! Cows go moo!

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